AdultFYI Continues The Year in Review; Stormy Storms Off NBC Lot; Meet the World’s Youngest Tranny

Laissez les bon temps rouler! In an obvious publicity ploy learned at the Mary Carey Academy, Stormy Daniels went on the campaign trail [ostensibly] in Louisiana, which is a good trick because Stormy’s a Florida resident though she grew up in Gumboville. But that didn’t prevent her from lending her two cents to the Bayou issues of the day.

Stranger turns of events have occurred, but Daniels could be representing the Pelican State as the next junior senator of Louisiana. In course, a group of admirers launched the website DraftStormy.com. An online petition on the site reportedly got thousands of signatures urging Daniels to consider taking on the family-values incumbent Republican Sen. David Vitter in the upcoming Louisiana primary that will lead to the 2010 general election. With the vast amount of signatures on the petition and as the mainstream media has picked up the story, Daniels presents an interesting alternative to the same-old, same-old.

By way of explanation, 1999 Vitter took a seat in the House of Representatives replacing then-congressman Bob Livingston [another scumbag] who was resigning after an adultery scandal. Vitter was quick to applaud Livingston’s decision and used it to spearhead the call for then-President Bill Clinton’s resignation following the Monica Lewinsky scandal.

Even Vitter’s wife, Wendy, was an outspoken critic–most memorably when she exclaimed that if her husband were ever involved in such an act, that she would take action and cut his dick off not unlike Lorena Bobbitt.

Cheap threats because on July 16, 2007 Wendy Vitter stood with a ghostly expression next to her husband at a press conference as he apologized for his business with a prostitution service after his telephone number appeared in a book of Deborah Palfrey, the owner of the prostitution company, also known as the “D.C. Madam.” Paltrey, herself, would go on to commit suicide thus depriving the mainstream press of another Michelle Braun the circus-comes-to-town story.

In an interview, with CNN’s Rick Sanchez, Daniels joked that she might not be willing to take a pay cut that would come with the switch from porn to politics.

“I might be a porn star, but I haven’t done anything illegal,” Daniels added. “I guess the big question is not only why is David Vitter in office, but why isn’t he in jail?” Half of Congress probably should be there but that’s just an opinion.

Daniels in her political quest would generate headlines several times during the course of the year. Descriptive of her name, Stormy left a scheduled NBC interview in a huff when she was turned away from The News Center in downtown Tampa.

Daniels was scheduled to participate in a satellite video interview with an NBC affiliate in Baton Rouge. However she parked in spaces reserved for photographers and executives of Media General, which owns The Tampa Tribune, TBO.com and WFLA, Channel 8. When security officers told her she couldn’t park there and had to park across the street in a visitors’ lot, Daniels hopped into her car and sped away.

In a dastardly act better suited to a Congressman or a get-a-way driver, Lexi Bardot was a victim of an Internet scam and told the porn world all about it.

“Hi there, I just wanted to set the record straight and let everyone know that someone illegally bought lexibardot.com and is now using it as an affiliate site for other websites,” she wrote

“How did this happen? Well back in 2005, when I first started doing porn, I bought the domain name lexibardot.com at register.com. I then proceeded to pay a web designer to design my website. He asked me to give him the passwords to my domain name so he could post the site. Little did I know, that he changed all the passwords and when I asked him to tell me what he had changed them to, he gave me a password that didn’t work. Hence, I was a victim to someone who knew he was taking advantage of me.”

How many times is that story played out in this business?

I love it when ballplayers play Charlie Sheen- Sheen himself being an avid sports memorabilia fan. In this story former Met star Roberto Alomar apparently had unprotected sex with his ex-girlfriend Ilya Dall while he had full blown AIDS. In a $15 million action filed in Brooklyn Federal court, Dall, of Queens, said that Alomar tested positive for HIV in 2006 and a doctor later told him he had AIDS.

Dall said she tested negative for the disease – but claimed punitive damages for emotional distress. She also claimed her children were exposed to the virus. Alomar, 41, a 12-time All Star, retired from baseball in 2005. He began dating Dall in 2002, and began having unprotected sex with her a short time later, according to the suit. Her suit does not claim that he knew he had AIDS when they were having unprotected sex – but he had reason to think he might because his doctors kept advising him to be tested.

He procrastinated and told her he was disease free, the suit said. In 2004, Dall said she noticed Alomar had cold sores. The following year he was diagnosed with a blood disorder that’s linked to AIDS. Adding to the fun was the fact that Alomar once told Dall that he was raped by two Mexican men after playing a Ballgame in New Mexico.

A doctor insisted that Alomar take an HIV test, but Alomar continually refused. In January 2006 he finally got tested and it was positive. Nine days later, doctors discovered a mass in his chest, and a spinal tap revealed that he had full blown AIDS.

Considering that Tera Patrick had been involved in a legal fracas with Digital Playground over the use of her name, it didn’t take a rocket surgeon to figure why Evan Seinfeld backed out of being on an XBIZ panel when Digital Playground’s Ali Joone was on it as well. The panel was to address the future for video producers, but whoever booked it probably forgot the past when Patrick and Digital Playground went pirate ship to pirate ship with Digital. Patrick won.

Sunset Thomas also made the news with her porn swan song, Into the Sunset. Directed by Axel Braun, Into the Sunset follows Thomas as she searches for the perfect penis to share. With the help of some of today’s hottest talent and a few friends from the past, Sunset embarked on her final journey. When all was said and done, one lucky fan, Chris Bellis from Win Gap, Pennsylvania, was the winner,

“The fact that I had a chance to share this moment with one of my fans was amazing!” said Thomas. “He did a great job, and added so much to an already fantastic movie!” The search for the fan began in 2007 and concluded in January of 2008, when Sunset held a final elimination party at the Olympic Garden in Las Vegas.

Another controversial story the porn big boys obviously overlooked during the year, was the one involving L&M Porn DVD manufacturers and the fact that 44 of its employees were arraigned in connection with a Valencia, California identity theft ring after Santa Clarita Valley Sheriff’s Deputies raided the premises netting 55 suspects.

The Los Angeles County District Attorney charged 18 people with one count each of ID theft, false personation and using false documentation. The 18 allegedly used stolen Social Security numbers and false Green Cards to gain employment at L&M in the Valencia Industrial Complex.

The D.A. also charged 33 defendants with one count of using each of using false documents and false personation for allegedly using phony Social Security numbers and phony Green Cards. Three defendants were charged with one count of using of false documents. The arrests came on the heels of a three-month investigation, but the story eventually got swept under the rug, and you can contribute your own suspicions why that was.

When business is slow sometimes you gotta take matters in your own hands. Such was the case of Phillip Chester of Lantana, Florida. Chester made headlines when he recruited boys to sell porn DVDs from the back of his pickup truck. Police said Chester recruited two 12- and 13-year-old cousins to sell more than 1,100 pornographic DVDs.

Chester was charged with contributing to the delinquency of a minor and distributing obscene material to a minor. Lantana police said the Georgia man arranged for the boys to sell the DVDs for $5 each, keeping $2 for themselves.

These stories happen all the time, but at least one porn chick- Michelle McClaren- got off her ass and picked up the phone. McClaren called me from the east coast in Connecticut where she was dancing and told me this story about a shoot she did earlier in the year- one for which she was supposed to be paid $1,000. And that’s where the story gets interesting.

McClaren had her check bounced and told the director if the matter couldn’t be resolved by a certain date, she was going to the press. It wasn’t resolved, hence the call. McClaren’s call time, the day of the shoot, was 1 pm.

“There was no makeup artist; Bill Glyde was supposed to show, he doesn’t show,” she said. Instead of calling for a replacement the director wound up doing the scene with McClaren- a scam in its own right. Then he paid her with a personal check instead of a company check. Scam #2. McClaren was told that Glyde had flaked and wasn’t picking up his cellphone.

McClaren was supposed to work the following day and there was more drama. She ended up leaving LA to go home. Then she checked her bank account online to find $1,000 missing. She called the bank and was told the check had bounced. Then she called the director and he didn’t answer the phone. Then she began texting him. He explained in a text it happened because he did a transferring of accounts, yadda, yadda.

When the check wasn’t made good and McClaren told of her intention of making the story public she was told by the director that when she was all tweaked out in the past he covered for her.

“I told him that was the past and I don’t give a fuck what people thought of me then or now,” says McClaren. “I have my shit together. Besides, that doesn’t have anything to do with this. I was messed up back in the day but I assure you, I’m not, now. We’re talking about a check. It’s turning out this guy’s a clown and I thought he was a cool guy.”

McClaren, who’s been in the business on and off about 3 ½ years, says this was the first time something like this had happened to her. I wonder if she ever got her money?

Those dealing with their own bounced checks may have missed the story about the world’s youngest tranny. That distinction belongs to a teenage boy who had a sex change procedure that made him a her. German Kim Petras, age 16, [pictured] was born Tim but wanted to be a girl from the age of two.

The operation was conducted secretly and authorized after psychologists deemed that Kim was “without doubt a girl in a boy’s body”. The operation was paid for by Germany’s government-supported health care system.

“I was asked if I feel like a woman now – but the truth is I have always felt like a woman – I just ended up in the wrong body, the Sun quoted her, as saying.

“I can enjoy swimming, and bikinis, go in the changing rooms without a problem, everything has changed because of this operation. I just can’t wait to put on my favorite bathing suit and go swimming like I’ve never done before. I had to wait until my 16th birthday but once that was past I was able legally to have the operation,” she added. Kim has a modelling career behind her and recently launched a CD of music.

Porn stars being found dead in hotel rooms are nothing knew – ask Damien Michaels who did it later in the year. But that was in Woodland Hills. This one happened in Hong Kong when a China-born porn actress, who played the late porn star Pauline Chan in a biopic, was found dead. Crystal Sun, 36, was found hanging in the bathroom of her hotel room by rescue personnel after a hotel worker discovered a note saying ‘Someone hanged herself’ on the bathroom door.

Sun apparently left a suicide note saying she had debts. Sources claimed that Sun was a victim of the current financial meltdown. Evidently some people don’t know how to accept poverty graciously.

In unerring wisdom, Red Light District then figured that if lightning could strike once, it could strike again and made the announcement that they were releasing another celebrity sex video. Only this time it was a sequel to One Night in Chyna starring Joanie Laurer, the steroid juiced he-woman.

David Joseph, president of Red Light District said, “Joanie is a huge celebrity that crosses many markets.” Yeah, kinda like an out of control semi crossing lanes of traffic at rush hour.

Wrote hollywoodgossip.com with good cause: “The original sex tape, One Night in China, somehow broke sales records for the studio; we can only surmise that fans of the steroid-laden former WWE star known as “Chyna” purchased it in order to see if Laurer had male genitals or not.

Red Light District is also responsible for distributing the Paris Hilton, Dustin Diamond and Amy Fisher sex tapes. If you wish to contact the company, it’s located in Hell.”

Speaking of creepy, Barry Jordan of Scottsdale, Arizona offered the mother of a 6-year-old girl $5,000 so he could perform oral sex on the child. Lucky for her, her mother was not some drugged out crackwhore looking for her next fix. Mom called police. Now this fecal grease ball awaits trial. Jordan, 44, pleaded not guilty to one charge of attempted child prostitution, a Class 3 felony and dangerous crime against children.

The mother told police she met Jordan, who is a Realtor, through a personal ad on the Web site Craigslist [how surprising] and the pair dated briefly. She then began receiving text messages saying how Jordan “enjoyed ‘young’ people.”

Jordan then reportedly began asking the woman about her daughter. He ultimately asked whether she would arrange for him to have oral sex with the girl. He initially offered to pay $5,000, then $500 for every time the mother brought her daughter to him. When detectives finally caught up with Jordan after placing him under surveillance, they found him with $551 in cash. Jordan told police that it was the mother whom they needed to investigate and that he did nothing wrong. That’s balls.

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