At Home in Pam’s Kitchen

This morning I had the stoutest of craps. Generally, a Starbucks Venti Mild is the culprit but I have a lingering suspicion that Wednesday night’s two-course meal in Pamela Peaks’ kitchen got the ball rolling. And to tell ya the truth it was great gourmet-style eating. Both entrees. There were Pink Pussycat cocktails for starters followed by Roasted Halibut with creamed peas and seared beef done up as an exotic steak salad. “It’s going to be really yummy- you’re going to love it,” said Peaks. Peaks, who gets her recipes from some pricey publication called Hello, was right about that.

With Randy Detroit manning camera and porn stars as guests, Peaks tapes this nude cooking show every Wednesday night, and last evening’s was the 29th installment over a stretch of eight months- just in case you’re keeping score. Format-wise, everything generally goes, except Peaks has this one rule- no talking shit about anybody. On-camera drinking, on the other hand, is thoroughly encouraged but house rules preclude talking smack. Yeah, with alcohol flowing liberally as sands through the hour glass, this is gonna work you think to yourself. But it does, actually. Everyone abides.

Last night’s installment – which will subsequently air on cable access – featured the redoubtable Dave Pounder, a perpetually smiling man from my neck of the woods in Bensalem, Pa. Neck of the woods or not, Pounder’s probably still trying to live down his last appearance on KSEX,, where his erection did a disappearing act. But you wouldn’t know it. Describing his fucking technique during the course of Peaks’ show, Pounder, suffering no lack of confidence, kept referring to himself as a machine. Confidence or not, there are two things redoubtable Dave has never partaken of in his life- anal sex and sushi, he says. In fact Pounder, flirting with calculated risk, touts his video series as being 100% anal-free. Which should have pleased another guest, Darien Ross, no end.

Also if you were keeping score, there was a whole six degrees of separation with KSEX bouncing around in that kitchen. Ross almost became the next Mrs. Chef Jeff if only she would have played her cards right. But Chicago native Ross, who showed up Wednesday night in this tiny bikini, tends to play it by her own set of rules. During one moment of chit-chat, Ross, who’s attracted to darker meat, is telling Pounder she don’t care what the guy looks like, if he ain’t lugging an immense package, she ain’t interested. Neither is Ross interested in anal, apparently. Ross is also talking about some movie she did about crack whores. Obviously it is not an anal movie.

Another guest was this cutie named Shannon Marie Codner who calls herself Katwoman and has, besides doing movies with Cumisha Amado, been challenging Halle Berry to topless duels lately. Not to overlook the obvious fact that Codner also has areolas the size of DVD’s. Also booked on the show was Rubee Tuesday who had just been to the KSEX studios two weeks ago, as was Utah Sweet and her size G’s who paid a visit there last Friday Rubee, wearing a makeshift Saran Wrap dress, is saying that she had just done a movie with Porsche Lynn. I was almost tempted to ask Rubee if they exhumed Porsche for this shoot because, frankly, it’s been awhile since her name surfaced in any capacity.

And, earlier in the day, Sweet had earned 700 bucks by doing a girl brawl with Summer Cummings all of which was financed by some British guy who apparently has a rep for underwriting four-camera custom shoots for his private collection. As British guys go, someone’s trying to tell Pounder he looks like soccer star David Beckham. A former bank employee, Pounder, however, is more content to make unabashed comparisons of himself to some apparently well known skateboarder. Ironically, Pounder is also an avowed macaroni and cheese man so it looks like I got his portion. That was the distinct impression this morning.

See also: The Luxury Companion


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