AVN had an article the other day that I thought was pretty funny. Sometime AVN comes up with good source material, although most of the time they’re press releases and dogshit. But every once in a while, they do provide good comedy.

I have a question, though. They have articles written by Mark Kernes. They have articles written by Peter Warren. Then they have articles written by AVN Staff. My question is who is AVN Staff? Mark and Peter put their names on an article. Is AVN Staff a secret code word for people at Manwin? I guess that’s something we’re never gonna know.

The article is entitled “HuffPo Informs Readers That Other Porn Stars Go to College” It’s in response to a Huffington Post article “There Are Other Porn Stars On College Campuses, You Just Don’t Know About Them” that talked about Tasha Reign and Spencer Scott.

I have said that certain porn girls like Tasha Reign have gotta be losing their minds that Belle Knox is getting all this publicity for doing porn and going to college. Because they go to college and don’t get any press. They are doing porn to pay for their college and get no recognition for it.

Long before Belle Knox, there were handfuls of porn girls who were “going to college.” Paris Gables, our former contract girl at Extreme Associates, who did all sorts of crazy stuff for us and appeared on Howard Stern throwing up on Jeff the Vomit Guy, attended UC Santa Barbara. Yes, the same UC Santa Barbara porn class study bullshit. She never had any articles written on her for going to college. When I was going through my obscenity case, UC Santa Barbara actually showed the film Forced Entry to a class. I didn’t know about it until I started getting all these letters from students asking about the case. So UC Santa Barbara was having classes and lectures on porn long before it became as trendy as it is now. The media picks up on it more now because you have Huffington Post, TMZ, Gawker, all these venues that weren’t out there in 04 and 05.

Tasha Reign’s gotta be screaming every time she sees Belle Knox. Girls like Tasha Reign and Spencer Scott are taking classes. They are not full time students. The enroll in selected classes so they can appear to be smarter then they are. Let me explain to you the difference.

I had a kid who worked for me named Kevin Kleinrock. When he started to work for me he was a full time student at UCLA. As a full time student, I know how long it takes and how much time is involved in being a full time student and how many classes you have to take. Trust me, there is no full time student, especially Tasha Reign, who would be able to participate in all the porn related activities and maintain status as a full time student, with studying and the whole works. As a full time student at UCLA, there is no time to fly to Dubai and have your picture taken with Bill Clinton. No time to fly to dance gigs and autograph signings or do content trades with everybody under the sun so you can release films.

What you can do is enroll in a bullshit class or two like women’s studies. That’s like when I went to college for about five months and took sports history. The history of sports. That’s what I took. It’s an elective to pad out your curriculum instead of having to take real classes. In between real classes I took sports history and criminal justice to fill out my schedule. That’s exactly what Tasha Reign and Spencer Scott are doing. Stretching out their curriculum.

From the AVN article:

“Tasha Reign, who, along with performer and cosmetology student Spencer Scott, was interviewed for the piece, currently attends UCLA…”

Tasha Reign attends UCLA? No, she takes a class. Spencer Scott, a cosmetology student? Are you for real? Cosmetology school is a college education? That’s something you can take in high school. Big fucking deal. A Fortune 500 company is definitely gonna hire a cosmetology student.

“Hello, Miss Scott. Welcome to the engineering department here at Toyota. What are your qualifications?”

“I went to cosmetology school!”

“That’s great, but we don’t put makeup on cars. Do you have any degrees in aerodynamics? Physics? Are you an engineer?”

“I went to cosmetology school! I can put makeup on the people who do the aero… aero… build the cars!”

There are probably 17 different hair salons and beauty shops up and down Lankershim Boulevard and everyone who works at them went to cosmetology school. The girl who cut my hair next door went to cosmetology school.

Listen, I get it. You’re all upset the Belle Knox got all this publicity. Let’s back it up here. She didn’t get all the attention by standing up and saying “Hi! I’m Belle Knox! And I do porn and go to Duke!” No, she was involved in a scandal where people found out she did porn and went to the school administrators and made a big stink about it. That big stink turned into a couple media outlets who picked up the story and made it into something. Nobody gives a fuck about a porn chick who goes to UCLA and takes a women’s study class. UCLA is in Los Angeles. Nobody fucking cares. And definitely nobody cares about a porn chick going to cosmetology school.

Somebody is either pissed off at Belle Knox or one of these girls are sucking on the “AVN Staff.”

This is even funnier:

“We would also be remiss in not mentioning one of the industry’s most respected actor/director/producers, Lexington Steele, who, as his Wikipedia page notes, “graduated from Syracuse University’s College of Arts and Sciences with a double degree in History and African-American studies in 1993.””

So this AVN article is basing their factual information off of the Wikipedia pages of porn stars. Lexington Steele has got a double degree? I’d love to see proof of that. I would love to see proof that Lexington Steele has a double degree from Syracuse University. I have no problem with saying that I’m am 100% wrong. I have no problem saying that I’m 100% sorry to Lexington Steele. But I’ll bet you 100 dollars that this is bullshit. If someone produces a picture of Lexington Steele’s two diplomas, I will say Lexington Steele is the greatest performer who ever lived and he will be the first one to ever prove me wrong.

I guaranfuckingtee you that Lexington Steel does not have a double degree from Syracuse University. I have two cousins who went to Syracuse. One is a CPA and the other has an MBA and runs the Cheeburger Cheeburger franchise. They went to Syracuse University and they donate to Syracuse and are big shots. Remember, I’m from Rochester. My family has porn stores in Syracuse. If I did some investigation, I’ll bet you I would find out that Lexington Steele does not have a double degree from Syracuse.

“And is it even necessary to mention porn’s 30-years-and-still-fucking-after-all-these-years legend, Nina Hartley, who earned her nursing degree before many AVN readers were even born, much less old enough to know what sex was. Hell, Hartley was probably getting her degree around the same time Arianna Huffington was marrying Republican Congressman Michael Huffington, who disclosed that he was bisexual after their divorce in 1997.”

I don’t know why they found it necessary to insult Ariana Huffington, but whatever. I guess that’s their way of discrediting Huffington Post? Why?

We’ve still never seen proof that Nina Hartley was ever a legitimate registered nurse. Not a nurse’s aide or anything like that. She claims to have graduated magna cum laude from San Francisco State in 1985. After she began her porn career. Again, love to see a diploma or her certification documents. What hospitals has she worked in? If she has a legit degree, why is she still working in porn? Why did she need a fundraiser to remove a cyst a few years ago? Seems a nursing career would be a lot more lucrative at this point than hustling porn gigs at age 55.

Then there is everybody’s favorite alt superstar Joanna Angel.

“And as famous as the mainstream media wants to make Belle Knox, we here would never list her fame as a college-attending porn star anywhere near that of Joanna Angel, whose personal story of founding BurningAngel.com in her Rutgers University dorm room about 12 years ago has been told many times on avn.com and was also the subject of a BusinessInsider.com profile last year.”

Does Joanna Angel have a degree from Rutgers University? Or is she another girl who took a couple classes, read a Dostoevsky book and claims to be college educated?

Again, I could tell everybody that I went to college. I went for five fucking months and I took sports history. I went to Monroe Community College. And?

People tell me I lie and our website’s full of shit. Well, tell me how I’m full of shit. If somebody says Rob Black fucks chickens and I say how do you know I fuck chickens? They say they have pictures and I say show me the pictures and I’ll admit to fucking chickens. I don’t hide from things. If somebody says I did something, I say show me the proof. If I claim something to be true I will back it up with documentation.

Unless somebody shows me the proof that Lexington Steele has a double degree from Syracuse University, I call bullshit. I don’t care what his Wikipedia page says. You can change a Wikipedia page all day. Show me a yearbook photo, something.

You know how Lexington Steele got into the business? He was brought in by Tony Everready and Byron Long. We shot a scene in South Central on a pool table back in 1998 for Friend to the Black Man and he couldn’t even keep his dick hard. Tony said he had a brand new guy he wanted me to try out and his name was Lex and all he could do is jerk off in the girl’s mouth at the end. A man with a degree from Syracuse University is hanging out with Tony Everready and Byron Long in South Central? N-word please.

This industry is so full of bullshit. I call you out and you call me a liar. I would love to be proven wrong. Show me the evidence. Did Joanna Angel graduate from Rutgers or did she just take a class or two like Tasha Reign and Spencer Scott?

Belle Knox was at Duke. You know what? I’ll bet she’s not even at Duke anymore. I’ll bet she’s not even a full time student anymore. She’s out doing all this press now. She probably blabbed all over campus that she did porn, university officials found out about it and busted her balls, the press got wind of it and that was it.

Tasha Reign, if you want some press, go to TCU or Oral Roberts University. Go to Oral Roberts University and tell everybody you do escort gigs and get fucked up your asshole and you’ll get some publicity. But taking a class or two in women studies at UCLA ain’t gonna get you no press.

So everyone get off this college bullshit. And AVN/Manwin, can you tell me what you’re so butt hurt about with Huffington Post?

AVN ends it with:

“Not to be snarky or anything, but the point is that the mainstream media does a disservice to the history of adult entertainment when it applies its all-too-common myopia to porn, and as a result continues to perpetuate stereotypes about the industry and the people in it for their own self-aggrandizement. HuffPo is a relative newcomer, of course, and as such it can pretend to be unaware of some things because it wasn’t around to experience them. The only problem is that assuming, through ignorance, that something never happened doesn’t mean it did not happen, and that goes for the many adult performers down through the years—too many to mention here!—who led complicated lives that often included the pursuit of higher education.”

“Isn’t that right, Dr. Axel Braun?”

AVN/Manwin staff. You’re story here would be a funny slap in the face if your “facts” weren’t completely full of shit. You’re referencing Lexington Steele, not from him providing any proof, but from his Wikipedia page. Huffington Post is not gonna do a story on Lexington Steele based on his Wikipedia page. They do a story on Belle Knox because it involved actual officials commenting from Duke University.

Huffington Post isn’t naive, they’re just not like you. A propaganda machine for Manwin promoting bullshit. You post stuff about people and you don’t have proof that they ever did a fucking thing.

Shame on you AVN for trying to say that Huffington Post is a johnny-come-lately to the party. They are a johnny-let’s-check-the-facts before they talk about the party. They’re not gonna talk about these people because they’re not gonna run bullshit.

There ya go. There’s AVN. AVN Staff should change its name to Manwin Puppets.

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