I happened to run into Calvin O’Shea Monday night. As is his custom this time of the year, whistle blower Cal was dressed in an especially colorful hazmat suit. I asked him what the occasion was?

“War Machine’s birthday party!” he crowed. “It should be a great time! On his Twitter page, he’s crowing that he plans on getting ‘faded and x-rated’ tonight [Monday].”

I asked if that wasn’t sort of like attending a pig roast on Hanukah, given War Machine’s recent rampage and ostensible ostracism from the industry.

“Nah,” O’Shea said. “Porn people have short memories. Ironically, I’ve heard at least two of Derek’s girls are planning to be there. Face it, War Machine is crazy, dangerous, and he floored Derek with a single punch. Porn pussies be getting’ wet, Gene!”

I asked if a hazmat suit was appropriate attire for a birthday party. “It is for this one,” O’Shea confirmed. “Any time you’re around War Machine, there’s a strong possibility of blood borne pathogens being splattered all over the place!”