Porn Valley- Dick Nasty returned to The British Are Coming show on KSEX Monday night. Nasty had been away in England. His co-host Taylor Wane asked him if he drank a lot of beer over there. Nasty says he doesn’t drink beer- even with the lads as Wane wanted to know. Nasty noted that he has two daughters 15 and 18 and says his 15 year-old enjoys slippery nipples. Wane said if he’s talking to his youngest about slippery nipples, he must be a sick bastard.

“How do you condone that at 15?” Wane wanted to know. Nasty said because everyone in England drinks. “They know when to stop and 18 is legal.” In a discussion of whether his daughter would be carded in a niteclub, Nasty said it would be more likely that his 18 year-old would, that she looks younger than the 15 year-old. Nasty said his oldest daughter has “a few medical things” that make her look younger and that Wane wouldn’t want them. “You wouldn’t want what she’s got- believe me.”

Nasty mentioned that he had been moving, during the course of which he came across a copy of the first movie he did in America. Nasty, not recalling the title said it was some Biff Malibu gonzo movie. Wane asked him who he was banging.

“Some English chick- I don’t know,” Nasty sighed. To which Wane said he was pathetic for not remembering either the girl or the video title. “It was 16 years ago,” Nasty protested.

Christy Canyon was their guest for the evening. Wane said Canyon had a nice ass and was certainly packing more in the trunk than Wane was. “I have an Armenian thing going on,” said Canyon. Canyon wasn’t sure if she had met Nasty before or not. The conversation went to Canyon having strapped it on, on occasion, to do guy’s in the ass. Wane suggested she and Canyon do Nasty.

“Let’s go to dinner first,” Canyon laughed. “Let’s get to know him.” Canyon said she likes to get to know the guy’s personality. Nasty couldn’t vouch for having worked with Canyon. Wane was talking about English girls with thick accents and mentioned that Nasty brought a girl like that on their show and had to translate for her.

In similar fashion, Canyon said an English girl came on her Playboy radio show. She brought a DVD titled Dirty Birds. yon said she likes really dirty movies, that having worked for Vivid she can’t get turned on by those types of movies. “They’re too pretty and fluffy.” Canyon said she likes the Airtight movies.

“Shit like that.” Canyon says she’s harbored fantasies about doing movies like those. Surprisingly, Canyon has never done an anal on film. “Personally I’m not into anal sex,” said Canyon. “I’ve done it in my private life.” Canyon said she was drunk when she did those.

Wane mentioned that she takes a certain medication that gives her the daily shits so you wouldn’t want to do anal with her. Canyon also let the listeners in on the fact that Wane also gets four-hour massages from “Massage Bob” who gave her this holistic medicine that cleans you out. Besides, said Wane, she doesn’t want every Tom, Dick and Harry banging her in the ass.

Going down the list of guys they’ve fucked, Canyon and Wane realized that they both fucked Marc Wallice. That’s another reason why Wane doesn’t want to do anal. “It’s much harder to get HIV, vaginally.” Canyon remembers guys working for Vivid having to wear condoms. Wane asked Canyon if that ruined the movie for her- guys wearing condoms.

“It didn’t- not at all,” said Canyon. “I don’t mind condoms but I don’t use them in my personal life. Everyone I had sex with on film I already fucked before that without condoms- Mark Davis, all those guys.” During her entire video career, Canyon only had one guy who couldn’t get it up for her. “Nick E,” she said. Wane wondered if that was Nick East.

“He had a problem with me,” said Canyon. “Wane said she bumped into East on a set a few months ago. “And he started telling me about this book he wrote- about aliens or somebody’s hiding and watching- some fucking shit. I go, okay. He said we’ve got to be careful because they might hear me.” Canyon asked if East were being serious. Wane said East is a sweet guy but doesn’t know what happened to him.

Nevertheless, to Canyon, there’s nothing worse than a guy who can’t get it up on film. “Or in your personal life- it’s so deflating for a woman’s ego.” Wane said it seemed common for guys to have problems but once the mid 90’s rolled around “suddenly everyone became superman”. Canyon said the last movie she made was in 1996 and to her knowledge nobody took Viagra. Nasty thinks it would have been much later when guys started taking the blue pill. Wane’s first movie was in 1989.

“There were certain people who were notorious for being limp- Dino [Wayne Summers],” said Wane.

“He reminded me of Bruce Willis,” said Canyon. “I forgot he even existed in this world.” Wane couldn’t remember Summers ever getting hard. Canyon remembered you having to get the camera on Summers fast to catch him coming. Wane said the company she used to work for [Arrow] would always want to hire him because he was a good actor. Wane said she pleaded for them not to because she didn’t want to work that hard for something that wasn’t going to happen.

“You could stand and whistle Dixie- the dick’s not going to get hard any time soon.” Canyon said she used to date a guy who’d have to shoot his dick up. “He was an old-timer.” Canyon said she met him through Ron Jeremy, that it was a blind date. He passed away. He was a famous real producer- I think director. That’ll be in my second book.” Canyon said every time they’d go to have sex, the guy would go in the bathroom.

“One day I looked through his pocket and there was like a little needle. He had to shoot his dick up or something.” Minutes later, Canyon remembered it being John Frankenheimer. Nasty said his ex-wife went out with him as well.

On the same subject, Wane thought they have something for guys with erectile problems – that they can take it to train your dick to work as a muscle. Nasty said there’d be guys who’d shoot up in the bathroom.

“Okay you’re going to be up in 15 minutes, you’re scene’s up next. The guy would go out to the bathroom and shoot his dick up and come back. You know what? We’re going to break for lunch, now. And the guys would just freak. It only stays hard for two hours then goes down.” Canyon suspects that’s why there’s more guys in the business. Nasty says he’s not happy about that because he never needed assistance. Canyon remembered interviewing Ron Jeremy on her radio show.

“He was so mad that the guys now are taking that- people like him, he doesn’t need it.” Nasty said especially with guys have his age taking pills. Wane remembered a time that Jeremy set her up on a date with Slash from Guns N Roses. Canyon said same thing for her. Canyon fucked him in the early ’90’s. Wane said then she got him then passed him on to Savannah. Canyon observed that Slash ate good pussy. Wane remembers it the same way. “It was the best I ever had,” But Wane couldn’t remember if that came from him being drunk on Jack Daniels.

“Whatever it was, it worked,” said Canyon. Canyon said Jeremy set her up on four occasions and she went four-for-four. Robin Williams was another one, she said as well as director Adam Rifkin. “He’s such a nice guy.”

Back from the break Wane and Canyon got on the subject of massages. Wane said Monica, one of her girlfriends got a massage in Vegas when they went to Gene Simmons’ party. The masseur went down on Monica and gave her head. “He masturbated her,” said Wane. “She orgasmed- then he said can I go down and give you head. She said, sure.” Canyon used to have a guy in a spa in Sherman Oaks play with her pussy after 45 minutes of massage.

“The sad thing is someone must have snitched because Vladimir’s no longer there,” she said