Lurking Retard Gets Sterned

The Rob Black Show is the number one broadcast in the adult business. It is the talk show that everybody listens to and everybody wants to be a part of. No matter how hard they try to deny what we represent and our relevancy, they always lose. At the end of the day, we are who everybody talks about. Every single day. All the same people who say we’re insignificant and are non factors talk about us every single day. They literally have devoted their lives to us. From creepy Twitter stalker Bill Margold to Mike South’s certifiably insane anonymous message board posters, The Rob Black Show lives rent free in their nutty skulls 24/7.

Two of those crackpot message board posters have been promoted to the status of contributing author on Mike South’s website. I am of course talking about the two loopy hausfraus Lacey Blake, the neglected and sexually frustrated wife of a Hollywood stuntman, and Lurking Reader, a 50 year old grandmother from Ohio who clearly is on a one way train to the funny farm.

A little over a month ago, Mike South did a post with the headline Rob Black is Responsible for Everything in Porn. He called me names, said I didn’t know how to write and that Tom Byron wrote everything on AdultFYI, which we’ve never denied, that I bounced checks (ten years ago) and just a bunch of rambling nonsense. He ended it with “Ok scumbag..ya got yer ten mins on my site…Im done with ya…sundays are slow anyway.”

Well, ladies in gentlemen, in the past couple weeks the ten minutes of fame that Mike South gave me a month ago has turned into days of fame. If you go to Mike South’s website, just about everything they post is about me and his message board people are talking about me. His contributing authors are not only commenting about me on the boards, but they are posting incoherent articles about me. Lacey Blake wrote an article about me with my name in the headline The nutty wife of a Hollywood stuntman will now referred to as “Mrs. Hooper” based on the 1978 movie with Burt Reynolds. Perhaps Mike South could change this on his list of contributing authors, since this list of contributing authors is constantly changing anyway. Brooke Tyler was a contributing author until she dared to call Mike South out on his message board and was replaced with Lindsey Lovehands. Lindsey apparently didn’t want call attention to the fact that she is a bukkake cum rag for a bunch of untested hillbillies, so she was taken off the list and now all that remains are the two cuckoo bird hausfraus Mrs. Hooper aka Lacey Blake and Dorothy the senile Ohioan grandmother aka Lurking Reader.

As loopy as the sexually frustrated hausfrau Mrs. Hooper is, Lurking Retard takes incoherence and rambling insanity to a whole other level.

This is too easy. It’s like taking candy from a retarded baby. Do you realize that Mike South has done absolutely nothing to effectively refute the allegations being hurled at him and in between posting press releases has turned his site over to a couple of crazy cuckoos who post responses to me? It’s fucking hilarious. The site that gets ten times the traffic that mine does, according to Alexa, is now devoted to talking about me. It’s too easy to play these idiots. is getting Sterned.

Let me explain what that means. When Howard Stern would go into a new market, whether it was LA or Philadelphia, he would go after the local DJ. He would go after the local DJ and call him a bitch and a punk, a phony and a fraud and everything he does is trying to imitate Howard and so on. The DJ would never reference Howard at first and would instead just say “some loser DJ from New York” and would not acknowledge him by name. Kinda like when Mike South refers to AdultFYI as “the lesser site” or refers to me as “The Kazoo.”

But eventually, as you keep the fire burning and you keep outing a scumbag like Mike South, they all crack under pressure and they have to say something. When they do that, they have broken their cardinal rule and then play right into Howard Stern’s hands. Mike South has been Sterned by The Rob Black Show, because all they have done for the past couple of weeks is talk about me and have made headline posts about me. Not in the comments section, but actual headline posts talking about me.

So the site that Mike South claims gets ten times the traffic, which equals 1.4 million visitors, is now devoted to talking about The Kazoo. When nut job Dottie post emails from me on Mike South and I talk about it, she thinks that Mike South is gonna get tons more traffic as a result. But if Mike South gets more traffic that AdultFYI, the result will be the opposite. AdultFYI will get more traffic because everybody who reads Mike South will go to AdultFYI to see what she is talking about. People who read AdultFYI already know about Mike South’s site. See how easy it is to play these morons?

I guess Mike South is on hiatus playing the banjo and looking for new white trash strippers for his bukkake boys to infect. Obviously, these two geniuses Lacey Hooper and Lurking Retard are not on moderation, so they are allowed to freely post. Monica Foster used to be allowed to post freely until she said something Mike South didn’t like and she was put on moderation. Same thing with Brooke Tyler. But these two loony tunes Hooper and Dottie apparently have free reign and have been posting about Rob Black and sending traffic to AdultFYI.

Mike South has gotta be losing his mind. If he’s not, he’s even stupider than I thought he was. The ten minutes of fame that he talked about a month ago has turned into days of Rob Black posts. The funniest thing is that the posts from Lurking Retard where she put up the emails that I sent her, she is so fucking stupid that she actually read my emails and thought I was being nice to her. Seriously. Anybody with half a brain who reads the emails will say “Hey Dorothy. Rob Black wasn’t wishing you a happy thanksgiving or asking you for a job, you dummy. He was insulting you and talking down to you and treating you like an idiot. Rob Black is right. Mike South is a retarded and the people who post on his site are equally as stupid.”

When I read the first post about me by Lurking Retard while I was talking a shit I was astonished and thoroughly amused. She has posted two more after that. This woman posted over 210 times on the message board during the month of May and I’m sure other months she has posted more. This 50 year old grandmother from Ohio is clearly psychotic. This is a bored, lonely, miserable soul.

When you read her comments you see a mentally unstable individual. She talks about me “begging for sex” and hooking me up with a job.” Some other gobbledy gook about being afraid someone is gonna come look at my records and spending a couple of hours waiting for my lawyer to show up and the big bad government wolf coming to get me. I’m thinking, “Who the fuck is this lunatic? Is she not aware I went to prison for this business?” Then she goes into a whole new stratosphere of craziness talking about her dad being locked up for the weekend and taking a shower and a hungry kid. Who is this wackadoo?

Then I remembered that this nut job actually emailed me about 5 months ago. I still had the email address so I emailed her back:

When did I ask you for a job fuck stick?
When did I beg for sex?
Let’s go you fucking loser
You called me out
Let’s go important one

I sent that email out and waited for a response. The lunatic never responded. After the show was over, Tom Byron comes in and says, “You’ve got to look at Mike South’s website. She posted the emails that you sent her where she thinks you’re asking her for a job.” I go, “What are you talking about?” Tom says, “Dude, this person is mentally unstable. Remember back in November when you got those emails from someone named Lurking Reader who was reciting all of this mumbo jumbo about Free Speech Coalition and stakeholders and movers and shakers and you replied busting their balls about being anonymous and speaking in codes and saying don’t waste your time with bullshit unless they knew someone who could get you on TV?” I said, “Yeah, I think so. Sounds vaguely familiar.” Tom goes, “Look at South’s site and you’ll remember. If this person was around here you would want a restraining order. Seriously. She’s certifiable. She’s fucking nuts.”

So if you go to Mike South’s site, she only posts my response. She doesn’t post the rambling nonsense that prompted me to tell her to go fuck herself. Katie Summer told me that she actually feels embarrassed for this person. That this person is so stupid that she doesn’t realize that I was making fun of her and not asking for a job.

Let me read you this email that I got from her back in November

“Now I have a question?”

“Are you looking to take down FSC/stakeholders more interested in ditching 2257 so they can fuck kiddies or continuing to shoot self in foot over small shit like south?”

“When you keep calling out south it diverts your msg that this guy was a CIA op and has spent the past year cozy with FSC teaching them all he knows about how to fuck kids. It also seems like sour grapes against a competitor when he isn’t picking up the same Tom Tom you are on that day.”

“Not saying you are wrong in any of your accusations…just wondering if voicing them at the same time you are trying to give info about this asshole/situation d jour is really best way to be heard?”

“Too many have followed the lead set by FSC…they want you to fight south…less energy to focus on their shit. They want you to have people talking about EVERYTHING so NOTHING gets done.”

Now here’s where it gets nutty:

“My geezer lawyer friend agreed with me that in some ways FSC treated you like a HIV performer over the obscenity charges..then took it a step farther and that it was worse..FSC was created specifically to fight for guys like you. gave me a huge ass history preFSC east, west, north south and central US trying to come together …biggest problem even bigger than aids..kiddie porn. One side of mouth saying ..we don’t stand for that..while they got hand under table grabbing all the cash they can get. As one of the guys who worked with the movers and shakers of the day pre FSC about developing an org to fight 1st amendment, obscenity, search and seizure and tons of other crap..he and others quickly distanced themselves once FSC decided to devote so much energy into fighting 2257…they wanted no part of that shit.”

Are you guys hearing this? This is a lunatic, man.

“Don’t believe me…go look at early representation on lawsuits..look at names that dropped from face of earth and the johnnie come latelys willing to make a buck anyway they could who picked up the torch.”

“Keep your friends close..enemies closer. people are gonna tell you what you want to hear…will they tell you what you REALLY want to KNOW? Can you stand and fight when they wrap you up in shit like foster got wrapped in..that takes her away from what she really wants?”

“Poppys been here a little over a week..showed him fosters site..once he saw the cox stuff and went to lawsuit..OMG that girl went off deep end, doesn’t matter how good, reliable or credible the info she pulls will be discredited. She can never be on stand at senate/congressional hearings that it will take to pull FSC/stakeholders down. The ones setting the tone for the entire industry.”

“I love what you’re doing..keep doing it..please focus on where you want to be in five years or you’ll still be shouting the same stuff with new names.”

Poppy’s been here a week? Senate congressional hearings? What the fuck am I reading? Who the fuck is “Poppy?”

Did you guys know that the only way to bring down the Evil Empire of Diane Duke and Christian Mann would be Senate congressional hearings? Those same people that hold hearings with GM about manufacturing defects that kill ten people are gonna be holding hearings with Free Speech Coalition and “stakeholders.”

Now you can see why this loser posts 210 times a month on a porn message board.

Hey Dottie, who were the “movers and shakers” of this “pre FSC” organization of people from east, west, north south, and central US?” Was this before Russ Hampshire and Pinky Stolbach and Lenny Friedlander? Who were these movers and shakers? I’d love to know.

So this lunatic sent me this email and I responded. This is where she thinks I was asking her for a job:

Hey Bro thanks for hitting me with an email. Don’t know what you want me to do with it. First, you’re a fake person. Second, you talk in codes like this is a fucking game. You talk about stakeholders and other boards (?) Jeffrey Douglas, Diane Duke, Chris Mann, just to name a few. It’s very basic and easy to look at who controls what.

I just came from someone’s office who does millions of dollars of biz with some of these stakeholders. So Lurking Reader if you got real information that’s not some type of JFK movie where have to play a fucking game hit me up. If not, go bother Monica and go find me a TV executive to give me a talk show.

Later Keyboard Warrior

This psycho then posts on Mike South’s site saying that I “asked this anonymous nobody to hook him up with a job.” This person’s fucking crazy. She didn’t realize that I was actually making fun of her. Do you guys get that? She thought I was actually asking her for a job. She thought I was serious. That’s scary. She’s fucking nuts. And this person is a contributing author on Mike South’s site.

She doesn’t post her drivel about Poppy and stakeholders and pre FSC east, west, north south, central, etc. She posts my reply and actually thinks that I was asking her for a job. This is a crazy person. A bonafide fucking psycho.

This is so embarrassing for this person. Even more embarrassing for Mike South who has opened himself up to even more ridicule. This is a person who Mike South corresponds with and he puts as a contributing author on his site. She posts that I asked her for a job and when I respond with when did I ask for a job she posts my email where I’m making fun of her and says “Must be this email…where he thinks I’m gonna turn into a fairy fucking godmother and grant his wishes?” She STILL thinks I seriously asked her for a job!

I can’t believe Mike South didn’t say to her, “Dottie, Rob Black was making fun of you. You’re gonna get ridiculed. I wouldn’t post this.” I guess that’s what you get for giving a nut job free reign to post. If Mike South didn’t vet any of this stuff, that means he was either out drinking moonshine and looking for diseased pussy to fuck or he’s actually as delusional as Lurking Retard. Which one is it?

I gotta imagine that Mike South had no idea that this rambling lunatic was gonna post this.

Then on Friday, just to fuck with her, I sent her more emails to post, which she did on Saturday with links that didn’t work. So her rambling, incoherent Saturday post made no sense whatsoever.

This is too easy.

Lurking Retard, Lacey Hooper and all the other keyboard warriors who want to play games. I invented the game, motherfuckers. I’ve been doing it since 1999. Let’s play. Keep talking about me on the site that gets 1.4 million visitors a month. I invented this game. You’re all a little bit late to the party.

You’ve been Sterned.

Peace out.

Follow Rob Black on Twitter @RealRobBlack Email: [email protected]

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