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Nadya Suleman swears off porn work and vows to stay celibate for five to ten years

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from www.dailymail.co.uk – Despite the demands of her vast brood, Nadya ‘Octo-Mom’ Suleman has found the time to scribble down a handwritten diary that will be the bafflement of future historians.

It’s certainly bewildering even to her contemporaries, as for the most part it’s made up of scribbles and strange stream of consciousness ramblings

But somewhere amidst all the craziness, the 37-year-old has laid down a framework for a kind of sexual revolution, and by that we mean, she won’t be having sex.

Nadya has vowed to stay celibate while she undertakes therapy and says she will never take on any more porn work – the mother of 14 once starred in an solo performance adult film.

According to Radar Online, she writes: ‘I choose not to give my body sexually to ANYONE. Not even myself. I won’t give what I can control away… I am not for sale.’

Nadya won AVN Award for her solo porn tape and has stripped – all to raise funds for her family – but the diary writings reveals the extent of her pain at doing so.

‘I’m to blame. I deserve to be punished. Punish me. Hurt me. Destroy me. As I am now done,’ she writes according to the website.

‘I focused 100% attention on my family, went back on welfare (I know), and never stripped again. Soon…you will be reading these words. And as soon as you are…we will be off welfare forever.’

‘Ones body is sacred,’ she writes.

“Should never be sold or shared…with anyone unless in a completely committed relationship.’

The mother of 14 children allegedly packed up and left her property in Palmdale after being asked to leave for not paying her rent for the month of April.

She left in the middle of the night despite being given three days to rectify the situation by Urban Resources Consulting on behalf of her landlord.

Nadya has owed $2,590 since April 1 according to RadarOnline, who also state that the star left a huge mess and stench of urine inside the pad.

‘Octomom had not paid her rent for the month of April as of last Wednesday,’ a source close to the landlord told the website. ‘Then, in the middle of the night, she moved her furniture and the kids out of the home, leaving the house in filth and smelling like urine. The landlord was disgusted. There were beer bottles in the garage and trash littered all throughout the house.’

Almost one year ago, Octomom was investigated by Orange County’s Children & Family Services when her hairdresser made a complaint.

And in 2009, the La Habra Police Department and Social Services of Orange Country investigated claims of child neglect.

Suleman moved to her 5,000 sq ft house in October 2012 after her former property was foreclosed.

According to a report by TMZ, she wasn’t even due to start making payments until April meaning she hasn’t even begun contributing.

She explained of her busy lifestyle recently that she is run down with costly tasks.

‘I do a lot! I’m a cook, a chauffeur and a nanny,’ she told In Touch.

Suleman says she spends ‘a couple hundred dollars a week on groceries’ for her ten sons and four daughters and does ‘several loads’ of laundry a day.

She came under fire last month after signing up for welfare after spending her savings on a trip to rehab, despite reportedly making more than the minimum amount required to qualify for federal financial assistance.

TMZ reported at the time Suleman has been receiving $1,800 a month for food, $1,000 for emergency cash, as well as medical benefits to help with mental health and dental issues after signing up for the programme in January.

But she is only eligible for the support if she brought in less than $119,000 in a calendar year, and according to TMZ, authorities believe she may have made over $200,000.

According to the website, The L.A. County Dept. of Welfare Fraud Prevention and Investigation has started calling her various employers from the past year to figure out exactly how much the television personality has earned, sources told the website.

The investigation includes combing through bank statements, cancelled cheques and wire transfer receipts, as well as asking her employers who else she may have worked for.

If she is found guilty of committing welfare fraud, she could face three or more years in prison.

Suleman did not comment on the allegations. But she remains resilient in the face of hardship.

She told In Touch: ‘We’ve hit rock bottom, but our struggles are what shape us.’

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