I’m deeply embarrassed by my picks this weekend though I can rationalize everything, and here it goes. The injury I anticipated to Eagles quarterback Donovan McNabb happened in the third quarter instead of the first. But by then the Eagles had scored 38 points on a Carolina team that looked like nothing from last year, though Jake Delhomme may be looking for a job after his miserable performance not only in the Panther’s last game of the season but this one as well. McNabb’s out for a couple of games but Michael Vick’s not eligible until the game with Kansas City.
And who expected Mark Sanchez to have such a sterling debut. I was counting on rookie jitters and a Houston win. Houston sucks and I will remember this the rest of the year.
No way the Broncos stole that game from Cincinnati in the last 10 seconds but they did.
Fuck Arizona. They had no business being in the Super Bowl last year.
I expected the Miami team from last year to be showing up in Atlanta.
Here’s the Two-Minute drill from the LA Times: at Atlanta 19, Miami 7: Taking a page from co-owner Serena Williams’ book, Dolphins blame loss on bad foot-fault call by line judge.
N.Y. Jets 24, at Houston 7: Sanchez is already being compared to Namath but is sad to learn he’ll never get to guest on ” The Brady Bunch.”
at New Orleans 45, Detroit 27: Lions lose again, get sympathy phone call from Michelle Kwan, who says winning isn’t everything.
Denver 12, at Cincinnati 7: After the game, Franco Harris sues Brandon Stokley for “Immaculate Reception” trademark infringement.
at Baltimore 38, Kansas City 24: Confused Chiefs were under the impression the season begins next week.
Dallas 34, at Tampa Bay 21: All it takes is one game without T.O. for Tony Romo to set a career high in passing yards.
Minnesota 34, at Cleveland 20: After game, Favre says the Jets also never informed the league that “I’m really, really old.”
Philadelphia 38, at Carolina 10: Hoping to increase chance of a winning season, Panthers ask NFL to suspend Delhomme like it did Vick.
at Indianapolis 14, Jacksonville 12: Manning ties Unitas’ team record for wins, but doesn’t look as cool in black high-tops.
at Seattle 28, St. Louis 0: Rams are so bad nowadays, Pom Pom Mom refuses to admit she was ever a cheerleader for them.
at N.Y. Giants 23, Washington 17: Redskins are too distracted by healthcare debate to put forth their best effort.
San Francisco 20, at Arizona 16: OK, Cardinals fans, please repeat after me: “My team is a one-season wonder.”
at Green Bay 21, Chicago 15: Jay Cutler era begins with a loss. Now all he has to do to make fans happy is win the Super Bowl.
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And here’s how the AdultFYI pool stacks up after Sunday with two more games Monday night:
Scott David 13-1
Danny from Foxxx Modeling 13-1
John Gray 12-2
Tim Case 12-2
Mike Dickinson 11-3
Karl the Birdman 11-3
Steve from Magnus 11-3
Steve Seidman 11-3
Kick Ass Chris 11-3
Sean, Porn Legends 11-3
0 & 16 Chuck 11-3
Kick Ass Ben 10-4
Ryan from Jerry’s 10-4
Jeff Mullen 10-4
Dr. TJ Eckleburg 10-4
Robert Interlandi 10-4
Steve Volponi 10-4
John from ASM 10-4
Gene Ross 9-5
Billy The Crystal 9-5
Sunset Thomas 9-5
Mike Fattorosi 9-5
Brian Wallace 9-5