Sean Looks at the Week of 1/24/2010 in Review; A&E Gets Ron Jeremy Blow Your Own Horn Award

Sean from writes: You want straight, no nonsense journalism, you stick with Adultfyi

The Janine Lindemulder Dope of the Week winner is an unnamed man who claims someone entered his apartment and purchased 18 pornographic movies while he was on vacation. At least that is what this dope told police after his $215.82 cable bill arrived. Funny, this dope was gone for a week and it appears he didn’t mention anything missing from his apartment. One would suspect these dastardly criminals would have done more that just sit and watch porn. It’s amazing what dopes will do to get out from having to pay their porn bill.

The Ron Jeremy Blowing Your Own Horn award goes to Adam & Eve. A&E issued a press release in which they patted themselves on the back for having increased profits in 2009:

“Through smarter marketing efforts, by taking advantage of growing marketing channels and by increasing operational efficiencies, we improved our profit by 17% over 2008,” says Adam & Eve Marketing Director Chad Davis.

Gee, that’s great news to all the under and unemployed people in Porn Valley. I’m sure they are all happy for A&E. However, considering that A&E is a privately held company, thus they don’t have to make true sales figures public; one should take their braggadocios statement with a grain of salt. For me, it’s kinda like some asshole on the Titanic boasting he has the last lifejacket as his fellow passengers go under for the last time.

The Dumbass Award winner is the Culpeper County Virginia Public Schools. One parent found the following passage from a book questionable so they eliminated it from their eight grade curriculum:

“There are little folds of skin all over the place, you can hardly find it. The little hole underneath is so terribly small that I simply can’t imagine how a man can get in there, let alone how a whole baby can get out!”

Not exactly erotic considering it was written by a 13 year old girl named Frank: as in The Diary of Anne Frank. claims that this book is usually banned for fear of depressing students. You know that whole World War Two Holocaust thing. But this appears to be the first time it has been banned because of its sexual connotations. Congrats, you dumbasses.

First runner up in this week’s Dumbass Award also involves banning books. It appears one parent in the Menifee Union school district in southern California demanded that the Merriam Webster’s 10th edition dictionary be removed because it had the definition of the term “oral sex” listed. That person wanted it pulled from shelves over fears that the “sexually graphic” entry is “just not age appropriate.”

The Asia Carrera Mensa award winners are Jessica Kathleen Alexander and Tammy Nicole Ortega. Out of stock in the brains department, these two water buffalo met a man on a telephone chat line and agreed to have sex with him in exchange for cigarettes. Well, after the trade, the women decided they didn’t enjoy the fucks for fags and reported to police they had been raped. Once police began investigating their story quickly fell apart. They were arrested for filing a false police report and police are considering pressing charges against the man for solicitation.

Belated Birthdays – Zoe Britton [33] 01/25, Lovette [37] 01/27, Alexis Texas [24] 01/29, Ebony Ayes [48] 01/29,

> Stormy Daniels: “People Are Dumb” – It takes an idiot to know an idiot, I guess. Read the story here:

> Ex-deputy in Joe Francis bribe case Acquitted – Read the story here:

> Intimate Pleasures: 2nd Circuit Upholds Town’s Definition of Adult-Oriented Business – This First Amendment and zoning battle has additional ongoing issues that delay a final answer any time soon. Read the story here:

> VideoXPress lawsuit: Size matters – Zoning Board members said they rejected the proposal because Video XPress failed to justify a need for expansion. Read the story here:

> The world’s second ‘pregnant man’: Scott Moore expecting baby, ‘Miles;’ in February – Read more about the freak show here:

> Nude and Noteworthy – January edition 2010 – Read the hype there:

> A History Of Political Sex Tapes – Those wacky Asian politicians. Read the story here:

> Alexis Ford’s Debut Movie Hits the Streets – Read the hype:

> Magazine’s Editor Declares Amia Miley ‘The Future of Porn!’ – Somebody buy this babe a cheeseburger. Read the hype here:

> Judge temporarily shuts down Bare Villa, Nakitas Playhouse – Following years of criminal complaints that included two homicides, Greensboro police and state alcohol agents embarked…Read the story here:

> Jeremy Bilding set to remain exclusive to Channel 1 Releasing – Read the hype:

> Adella Out at Digital Playground – I don’t care either. Read the rumor here:

> xPeeps Celebrates Four Years with Launch of Mobile Site – Read the hype:

> 14-Year-Old Faces Child Pornography Charges for Sexting Naked Pictures of His Ex – “I think they need to realize a lot of what they are doing, a lot of what they are doing, can do permanent damage to somebody,” she said. Read the story here:

> CBS Eyes Gay Web Site Ad For Super Bowl; Costing $2Mil – Former Heisman Trophy winner Tim Tebow will star in a pro-life spot during the big game, too. Read the story here:

> Adult Stores’ Cucumber Billboard Offends Some Texans – Read the story here:

> Ron Jeremy at University of Nebraska-Lincoln next week – Professor Buckets takes his carnival act on the road. Read about the magical mystery tour here:

> AEBN Adds RealTouch to Affiliate Offerings – Read the hype:

> John Edwards’ ex-mistress wants sex tapes back – And I want them destroyed. Have you seen this ugly bitch? See her and read the story here:

> The Gay Industry’s Traci Lords, Brent Corrigan: “The underage work was wrong altogether” – Read the story here:

> John Edwards Spent Campaign Money on Mistress Says Book – Edwards has said in a previous statement that he is “confident that no funds from my campaign were used improperly.” Read the story here:

> Story of the Day Replay: Michael Weinstein wants to save porn actors from STDs; “It’s been lonely” –

> Millions Of Extra Sites To Be Censorsed As Australian Gov. Bans Small Breasts, Female Ejaculation – Read the story here:

> Flynt Media Corp. Reveals Portfolio of 72 ‘Flynt’ Sites – Read the hype here:

> Taryn Thomas Brings ‘Jersey Shore XXX: A Porn Parody’ to the Jersey Shore at WRAT Men’s Expo – Read the hype:

> ‘Caligula’ director to make “First” 3D porn film; [He Must Have Forgotten About The Stewardesses] – He said he would start work on casting and the script immediately, and that he planned to start filming in May or June. Read the story here:

> Intelius co-founder charged with lying About Having Sex w/ Strippers in Colacurcio strip-club investigation – “Truthful testimony is the bedrock of our criminal justice system.” Read the story here:

> Mansion Partyer Now Suing Playboy – A man claims he went to the Playboy Mansion — and all he got was a “savage” ass kicking. Read the story here:

> 3D Porn Viewed on a Website – Read the hype:

See anal warts like you’ve never seen them before.

> Update: Pleasure Productions/IVD Must Cough Up $500 G’s in Sex Harassment Case – “You have to have a punitive award that’s large enough to get their attention,” he said. “It has to sting a little. It has to hurt.” Read the story here:

> Another Hot to Trot Teach Story Hits Brooklyn’s James Madison HS – The ol’ lesbian PE teacher story. Read the details here:

> Police catch Peeping Tom at peep show – Read the story here:

> Update: Porn Watching Truck Driver Killed Julie Stratton, Mother of Two, Say NY Cops –

> Sponsors XBIZ Los Angeles Conference 2010 – Read the hype:

> Hustler Mum So Far About the Curb Your Enthusiasm Porn Version Casting – Dave Cummings? – Read the story here:

> Shopping Her Book, Michelle Braun’s Girl Loredana Jolie Says Tiger Woods ‘Not Normal’ – “I am not really sure rehab for sex addiction will help him,” Jolie told Page Six. Read the story here:

> Announces Site Launches & Affiliate Program – Read the hype:

> Update: “Off The Set: Porn Stars and Their Partners,” a forthcoming book publishing in April – Read the update here:

> Mom of two mowed down by trucker watching porn on laptop – Thomas Wallace of Brook Park, Ohio, is charged with second-degree manslaughter…Read the story here:

> The Last Dirty Picture Show – The international inventory of adult cinemas is down to 105, with 31 in the United States. Read the story here:

> Former Deacon of a Baptist Church Now Runs Adult Novelty Shop – Praise the Lord and pass the KY jelly. Read the story here:

> Man Claims Intruder Ordered 18 Pay-Per-View Porn Movies – At a cost of $11.99 each, the movies were ordered… Read the story here:

> Adult Pleasure Zone Launches New Rocks-Off Collection – Read the hype:

> Nominated for Innovative Company of the Year; Ashley Fires for Web Babe/Starlet – Ashley Fires…I’d like to tame her shrew. Read the hype here:

> Launches – From the Taylor Rain empire…read the hype here:

> In this Day and Age Wisconsin High School Issues Archaic Dance Rules – But they haven’t outlawed prom night dumpster babies. Read the story here:

> College Has Porn on the Curriculum – Read the story here:

> Batman And Schevelle Tour Gets Abducted In New Mexico – Read the latest installment of Gulliver’s Travels here:

> Private Moments Adult store in Keaau draws landowner’s ire – It is across from the middle school, public library and the Boys & Girls Club of the Big Island. Read the story here:

> Rebecca Blue is Penthouse Babe of the Day – Read the hype:

> Stormy Daniels Doesn’t Like Most of the People at Wicked? Steve Javors Gone from XBiz – Read the post from here:

> Not Looking Good: FriendFinder Networks Said to Delay IPO to Next Week – This IPO will soon disappear into the vapor. Read the story here:

> Online Game Has Kids Giving Out Virtual Condoms – Could be the stupidest video game every invented. Read the story here:

> Kagney Linn Karter Goes Live With Full-Service Online Presence – Read the hype:

> ‘Cougar’ on the prowl: ‘Playboy’s’ Cindy Margolis hunts for Mr. Right on reality TV – Read the story here:

> National Magazine Highlights Web Directory of Porn-Free Hotels – That may be the world’s smallest directory. Read the story here:

> “Sex Addiction Expert Craig Gross Sees Warning in Tiger Woods Case” – Read what the ass-bag has to say here:

> Kitten Leaves Sex Spaz and Sinnamon Love Takes Over as New Host – Read the hype:

> Do Adult Film Stars Play Video Games Too? Watch the Video – I tried watching but it had too many geeks.

> Ohio court: Online child porn law affects private chat, IMs, e-mail but not public Web sites – Read the story here:

> Missouri Attorney General Calls for Execution of Hitleresque Man Linked to Larry Flynt Shooting – Fire up ol’ Sparky. Read the story here:

> Australian Porn battle looms Involving Owner of G Media – Read the story here:

> Copperfield Accuser Charged with Prostitution – Also faces the charge of providing a false statement to police… Read the story here:

> Mary Carey No Longer in Philly Radio’s Pig Out Fest – Pick Your Reasons – Sounds like how AVN awards are purchased. Read the story here:

> Update: Alexia Moore Acquitted; Vows to Get a Normal Job – “Something with animals,” she said outside court Tuesday. Read the story here:

Sean: Sure, she’ll be back on her back and counting ceiling tiles within the month.

> Adult Industry Campaign Contributions Continue to Be Investigated in Pay for Play Allegations – “We weren’t accusing him. We just wanted to know what was going on,” Ervin said. Read the story here:

> Update: Larry Flynt to lead free-speech symposium – Read the story here:

> Berlin, Connecticut versus Very Intimate Pleasures – “We need to make VIP’s application DOA, protecting children and residents from the well-documented harms of such businesses…Read the story here:

> Fellatio Expert Critiques Celebrity Sex Tapes – Says Paris Hilton isn’t a good cock sucker. Read the story here:

> Racy items have Spencer’s in trouble with Rapid City, SD – The store’s back corner features floor-to-ceiling displays of sex toys, games, dolls and other adult merchandise. Read the story here:

> 16 Year-Old Boy To Become Great Britain’s Youngest Tranny – Britain’s National Healthcare System (NHS) was said to have agreed to fund the operation costing $16,000…Read the story here:

> Hot-to-Trot Teach Trial Has an Interesting Switch; Acquitted of Sex with Her Godson – Lopez testified that the boy raped her in 2007 and threatened to accuse her…Read the story here:

> Canadian MILF Shandafay Joins the Vette Nation – Read the hype:

> Adult Source Media Releases Animated Male Erotic Masterpiece, ‘Tales from the Gods’ – Animation:That will get them around the condom issue. Read the hype here:

> to Offer Anarchy Films 30 Days Earlier Than Other VOD Sites – Read the hype:

> Another Porno Tiger Parody Hits the Fairway – If you’re keeping score, I believe this is now three of them…Read the hype:

> “Live sex cams, pornwebcams are the most popular adult content on the internet” – Read the hype:

> Tiger Woods’ Alleged Porn Mistress Joslyn James in Mercenary Pictures’ ‘Joslyn James: Tiger Tamer’ – Read the hype here:

> New Photography Book Explores Adult Film Stars’ Intimate “Off the Set” Relationships – Shows a lovely photo of Stromy Daniels pasting her husband with a lamp. Read the hype here:

> Cops at an Impasse in Sladewski Slaying – Police don’t have any new leads and have not received any tips… Read the story here:

> Penthouse Porn Publisher FriendFinder Beats Facebook To IPO Punch; Shares to Price $10 to $12 – Watch the stock crater soon after the open. Read the details here:

> Missouri Attorney General backs plan to let child porn victims sue – Good premise but it would never work. Read the story here:

> Music Video Preps Sunny Lane for Alice – Read the hype:

> Up Against the Wall and Spread ‘Em for Fetish Nation’s Return – They should hire that gay cop. Read the hype here:

> Cop fired for not telling about gay porn past, wants police job back and Is Suing for Wrongful Termination – Read the story here:

> Bizarre Brothers Joins Pulse – Read the hype:

> PETA Ad Featuring Porn Princess Sasha Grey Offends the Majority of Viewers, Poll Claims – More proof that society loves you. Read the story here:

> Rob Rotten To Announce “The Rottens” Hall of Fame Winners – Read the hype:

> Leonardo DiCaprio’s face slasher arrested in Canada – Read the story here:

> Initial Penthouse Offering, Take Two: Go Public or Go Bust – I’m putting my money on go bust. Read the story here:

> Webcams and nude models are the staple of Adult online industry – Read the infomercial here:

> John Edwards Sex Tape? – “is explicit and reveals that Edwards ‘is physically very striking, in a certain area,'” Read the story here:

> This August: Storerotica’s 2010 “What’s New Marketplace” Convention and Tradeshow – Sign up now if you think you will still be in business in August. Read the hype here:

> Larry Flynt to Speak at University of North Carolina Free Speech Event –

> On Trial: NYPD Officer Allegedly Sodomized a Man with a Baton – Sounds to me like this jackoff needed a tune up. Read the story here:

> Immoral Productions & PrivateCamz increase production to 5 days of Live shows – Read the hype:

> Hush Money and Justice Young Launch – Read the hype:

> Update: Amy Fisher Stripping for Haiti – Read the desperate attempt for attention here:

> Triangle Films Releases River Rock Women’s Prison on HotMoviesForHer; Release Party Jan. 27th – Read the hype:

> Aristotle Executive to Speak on ID and Age Verification at International Cyber Security Conference – Read the hype here:

> Sunset Thomas Enshrined at The Palms Restaurant—Las Vegas – This is going to piss off Tera Patrick. Read the story here:

> “8 reasons you wouldn’t really want to date a porn star” – Read the humorous list here:

Reason #9 – They are all bat-shit crazy. Reason #10 – See #9

> Michael Lucas, Now a Travel Agent, Offering Trips to Israel – Kinda like those fuck a porn star type trips. Read the story here:

Be the first to comment

Leave a Reply