from www.adultcybermart.com – Remember Whispering Joe Wilson? Of course you wouldn’t. Why am I even asking.

Whispering Joe, a skinny man with crazy eyes matched by a very rakish sense of mustache, thus giving him the look of a barker at a live sex show, was a bowling commentator.

When old time syndicated TV in the 1950’s was infatuated with the sport, Whispering Joe came into our living rooms every week from the Faetz & Niesen bowling center in Chicago.

The matches were filmed. Back in those days you had stars like Eddie Kawolics, Don Carter, Carmen Salvino, Billy Welu, Steve Nagy and Johnny King competing in round-robins against one another. Although Nagy was the first to roll a perfect game [300] on TV, I remember King also rolling one.

Whispering Joe had a way of making the conversion of the 7-pin for a spare sound exciting, so you can imagine when King reeled off 12 straight strikes in the pocket how pumped up Whispering Joe [he was anything but whispering] got.

When cigars became a banned indoor sport, and even with The Big Lebowski, I kinda lost my romance with the whole thing. Yet I often wonder how Whispering Joe would have reacted to the idea of bowling in the buff.

Normally nude bowling is a practice banned in most polite societies. Except one day out of the year, Bill Margold gets an alley to turn their cheek, in a manner of speaking. And there you’ll have a one-of-a-kind event featuring naked porn chicks and the fans who bring their balls for fun and frolic.

BARE Bowling as Margold likes to call it, is generally held the Sunday evening before Labor Day. Last year it was switched to the day before Memorial Day, but Margold’s been doing the event so long, he doesn’t even remember the exact year it started.

Margold first had the idea of using it to raise money for scholarships. Then it evolved into a PAW fundraising event, and Margold is hoping to use this year’s proceeds towards underwriting some of the expenses of a celebration that will herald porn’s 40th anniversary, next summer.

[The premier of Deep Throat is the acknowledged start up date of the industry, and Margold intends to induct 24 performers into a special edition of the Legends of Erotica and to commemorate the inductions with individual medallions.]

Even if it’s a simple nude car wash, Margold and the porn fans have always had this great, simpatico relish for juvenile play time.

“My primary goal is to get the fans [most of them resembling characters from The Big Lebowski] up close and personal with the performers,” Margold explains.

With that in mind, Margold for years ran the FOXE Awards, and you never know what could happen at one of those shindigs. Margold even seems to be under the impression I was banging Kim Chambers in a dressing room on one occasion, but, like in the John Wayne western, The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance, when the legend becomes fact, print the legend.

“I prided myself in those events,” Margold recollects.

“Those FOXE shows were the best. We’d pack in the people and you never knew what was going to happen, and I didn’t care. The doors were closed. It was a private party and people got what they wanted for their money.”

Even one year a woman went among the crowd sucking duck, but even fans get jaded. When interest in that event died, Margold shut it down.

Yet what happens at a nude bowling event is as bathed in secrecy as a Masonic ritual. Even the location is kept hush-hush.

“I never guarantee anything because I never know what’s going to happen,” says Margold who notes there’s never been a bad event.

“As long as there’s one nude lady [female performers are allowed in free] for each lane, the fans don’t complain. It’s nowhere near as ribald as any of the events FOXE would stage, well, because it’s a bowling alley except for the fact the women are stark naked though some of them take the bowling pretty seriously and get into the competition.”

“Whether they do any thing else with the pins is debatable, although there are rumors that some of those pins have been places they shouldn’t have been.”

The year Mila, aka The Colon Rose, showed up, she met some beer bottles she couldn’t say no to.

“She put on a performance rarely seen,” Margold recalls, chuckling.

“I can’t tell people what and what not to do; it would violate who I am,” continues Margold who’d never be the one to get between bowling and consenting adults.

Sunny Lane attended many of those events and Margold always considered her his mascot.

“She was a joy and a charm. I miss her,” he rues.

“The day that I met her I told her the less you do, the more valuable you’ll be. She was very good at it and had a zest and a life to her I’ve not seen in long, long time.

“People would start screaming when she came into the bowling alley, and I thought you don’t see that much. Now that she’s married I don’t know what her plans are.”

There will be a number of drawings and raffles. That’s the plan. Not that he’s promising it as fact, but Margold hopes to stage a lingerie show also that evening. The first time he tried one of those was in 1985.

“I knew that the fans wanted to meet the performers and I started the Toy Box lingerie shows. It was unbelievable and fun. The fans would come up and remove the lingerie with their teeth. We had classic performers and those days were fantastic.”

According to Margold, Dr. X will again set up a photo room for fans wishing to take snaps of their favorite girls.

“Dr. X has been very invaluable to me,” adds Margold who suspects that Ginger Lynn and Amber Lynn will be also at this year’s event.

“People take thousands upon thousands of pictures. I guarantee you no one goes away disappointed.”

Once in awhile a male fan might get carried away and take his clothes off.

“It proves that most men are not created equal,” laughs Margold, acknowledging that the alley is pretty well air conditioned, thus serving as a natural deterrent to potentially embarrassing ardor.

[The tickets for the event scheduled for September 4, 2011 are priced at $40 per bowler. Since the event is limited to 120 participants, they are being sold on a “first come” basis. Teams of five bowlers can register for the “Bare Bottom” price of $175. You will be notified of the time and the location when your ticket(s) are sent out. 18 and over! No alcohol will be served.

Send your payment to:
Protecting Adult Welfare, 8033 Sunset Blvd. #851, Los Angeles, CA 90046

Include your name, home address and email address. Or for further info call (323) 436-0060 or contact [email protected]]