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Bonds Sold Steroids To Nuns, Says Nutcase Who Sued Michael Vick for $63B

Meet Jonathan Lee Riches. The federal prisoner/habitual litigant recently scored headlines with his insane $63 billion lawsuit against Michael Vick (who allegedly stole Riches’s dogs, sold them on eBay, and used the proceeds to buy weapons from the Iranian government).

Riches, who is doing a decade in prison for fraud, is at it again, this time filing a loony–though quite funny–complaint against Barry Bonds, baseball commissioner Bud Selig, and Hank Aaron’s bat. In his lawsuit, Riches weaves an intricate conspiracy theory involving television ratings, steroids, the cracking of the Liberty Bell, Colombian narco-terrorists, and secretly recorded conversations for which journalists Robert Novak and Judith Miller have transcripts.

Riches’s August 13 lawsuit, which he filed in U.S. District Court in Indiana, is the 17th federal complaint he has filed since January 2006. Imprisoned in South Carolina, Riches has filed his lawsuits in 15 separate federal jurisdictions, presumably moving state-to-state to avoid sanctions over the filing of frivolous actions.

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