Porn News

Could Laffoon’s Porn Habit Pay Off?

Los Angeles – An online porn payment company is offering a load of advice to wacky Anne Heche’s estranged and allegedly whack-happy husband, Coley Lafoon: Stop getting caught with your pants down!

TMZ has obtained a letter sent by PureVanilla.com VP Kevin Blatt, explaining how Coley might address his purported hobby in the future:

Coley Laffoon:

We understand where you are coming from. So you looked at a little porn? What guy doesn’t? If your ex Anne Heche was the judge, ANY guy looking at porn could be considered a “porn-addict with compulsive masturbation problems.” Well, we know that’s not true about you. For innocent guys like yourself, THE CRIME WASN’T LOOKING — THE CRIME WAS GETTING CAUGHT!!

We are prepared to offer you something that will protect your privacy — A PureVanilla.com Gold Card. With it you can join a ton of sites without anyone ever finding out — the website names don’t show up on your credit card statements, and the websites never have access to your personal information — so nobody will find out what you’re doing. You are completely anonymous! It’s perfect for celebrities who need privacy but want to look at porn (Charlie Sheen, are you listening??) PureVanilla.com is the only company that can offer privacy protection on every transaction you make through us.

So what do you say, Coleman? Wanna look at some more porn (without getting CAUGHT, that is)??

234 Views

Related Posts

Miami Spice: The 2024 XBIZ Creator Awards Show Turns Up the Heat

MIAMI — Adult creators’ biggest night relocated on Wednesday evening to the party epicenter of Miami.The 2024 edition of the XBIZ Creator Awards, presented by Fansly, honored the best and shiningest creators in the industry at the city’s hottest, sultriest…

Kazumi Performs 1st Anal & D.P. in Blacked Raw Scene ‘Beast Mode’

Fans will be treated next Monday, May 20, to the first-ever anal and double-penetration encounters of 2024 AVN Awards co-host Kazumi's career.

Mystim Scores 2024 EroSpain Win

May 16, 2024 4:08 PM PDTBARCELONA — Pleasure brand Mystim has nabbed the 2024 EroSpain Award for Niche Brand of the Year. ‘We are incredibly grateful and proud to win the EroSpain Award for Niche Brand of the Year,” said…

Gender X Films Begins Rollout of Jim Powers’ ‘Trans Campers’

Gender X Films today bows the first scene of "Trans Campers," the latest production from AVN Hall of Famer Jim Powers.

BateWorld Drops New ‘BateOff’ Episode

May 15, 2024 2:21 PM PDTLOS ANGELES — BateWorld has dropped the third episode of “Great BateWorld BateOff” season three. “After two explosive episodes, the bators are tasked to create a sizzling hands-on promo for the premiere masturbation lubricant, Bator Balm,” said a rep.…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.