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Quaze & Tyler Talk about Not Talking to Press

Porn Valley- Quasarman had Tina Tyler on The Distorted Reality Show Friday night, noting, cynically, that Gauge no longer does the show. “But apparently she does do just about every other show out there,” he said. “She recently appeared on The Sports Swami program.” Quasarman speculated that if only 4 people listen to Distorted Reality, 1 1 /2 are listening to The Swami.

“Why is Gauge doing the Sports Swami and won’t come to her own goddamn show?” he asked. “That’s my question.” It was Tyler, who describes herself as a gay man in a woman’s body, venturing a guess, not knowing Gauge, that it was because Quasarman looks wimpy in his headphones. Quasarman also added the word “effeminate” to the glossary.

Quasarman mentioned the HIV situation which has been “talked to death” but touched on a subject relative to it- talking to the mainstream press. Quasarman said he had been approached. “But mum’s the word because anything you say will be used against you.”

Tyler, [echoing Wankus’ recent Untitled Rant:], said the level of stupidity [exhibited by talent talking to the press] has made her angry. Quasarman said Dave Pounder getting a quote in the press is tantamount to a guy owning a Ford being a spokesman for Ford. Tyler’s analogy was that of an extra on a movie set scoring press junkets.

“This man [Pounder] without a condom cannot achieve an erection,” said Quasarman. “Can you imagine what his penis will react like when you wrap latex around that thing and try to use it as God intended.” Quasarman, of course, related the infamous Pounder attempt to achieve wood at the KSEX studios but failing miserably.

“If I am Dave Pounder adult industry spokesman and leading stud, maybe you would expect that [success]. If I have a stubborn clog at my house a plumber comes and brings a wrench. I have a stubborn vagina on the set he brings an erection.” Tyler, a former P.R. person herself, suggested that there was a lot of people who should not be talking to the mainstream press.

“I encourage no one from the industry to talk to the mainstream press,” she said. “Because the mainstream press has it in for us. They were just waiting for something like this to happen so they could pounce all over us. They’re not going to be kind to us. They never have and they’re not going to start now. My recommendation is if you really want to get your opinion out, is get it out in writing on your own website, in your own column. That way, if the mainstream press takes something, they have a harder time misquoting you. And even if they do, you have the original and you an say they misquoted me.”

Quasarman offered other reasons why it was dangerous to offer sound bites to the mainstream press.

“If we were, perhaps maybe we wouldn’t be in porn.” Tyler said she’d have to agree.

“I am a little bit more intelligent certainly than the average porn star,” Tyler said. “But at the same time, I have issues. Otherwise I wouldn’t be here.” Citing his own issues, Quasarman was quick to agree that he wasn’t nearly as smart as he’d like to think he is.



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