Ron Jeremy writes on www.blackbookmag.com – In Boy Scout camp, I bent over to put on a pair of hiking boots and I could kiss my schlong. I called my dad and asked if it was normal for a guy to be able to kiss his own schlong and he was like, “Is anyone in the room with you right now? No? Good. It’s a little weird, and I don’t suggest you tell anybody. But don’t worry about it because, by the time you’re 18, girls will start kissing it for you.” I never thought, 10 years later, they’d be doing it in movies.

My goal was always to be a mainstream actor. I was accepted to the Lee Strasberg school in New York. I earned a Bachelor’s degree in acting at Queens College and I also taught at a school in New Jersey.

I was trained, but I settled for porn because, without connections, it’s difficult to catch a break. You can be the best actor on earth, but who can tell when there are 900 kids in line for the same role?

Porn was such a nice change after all of those auditions in roach-infested basements where I had to read Shakespeare soliloquies. Back then, there were no DVDs or computers, and a lot of porn, like Co-Ed Fever and Café Flesh, had pretty classy storylines. I still felt like an actor, whereas today, it’s the opposite.

There were so few porn stars in the old days because you had to be able to get an erection, hold an erection and finish. But any guy can now be a star with the help of a pill. I’m proud to say I have never taken one in my life, which is funny, because I’ve endorsed many. In one TV spot, they have me in a tyrannosaurus costume calling it “Reptile Dysfunction.”

I never asked for extra money because of the size of my schmekel, although it was without question my moneymaker. You’d be amazed at the number of girls who still come up to me, while I’m hosting a club gig or something, and ask to see what’s dangling between my legs. But it’s a trade-off: you flash some boobies, I’ll flash the schmekel. Paris Hilton and Bijou Phillips were at the wrap party for Wonderland and Paris wanted to see it—this was before her sex tape came out—so me, Paris and Bijou went to the bathroom and traded flashes.

I do a series with younger girls called Jurassic Cock. I love working with some of the older girls, too, but it’s not what people want to see. They want to see MILFs and cougars with young boys. People always expect to see the captain of the football team with a gorgeous cheerleader, but then they see me with a gorgeous girl and say, “Hey, that’s good for all of us.”

Drew Carey did the funniest bit about me: “Brad Pitt is supposedly hung, and that’s totally not fair. He’s a nice guy, great looking, gives to charity and he’s hung? Mother Nature should take you at your birth and be like, “Look, you’re either going to be hung or good looking—not both. Look at Ron Jeremy. Now that’s fair.”