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Thoughts Over The Morning’s Coffee: The Industry’s Turning into Monday Nitro

If you’re a wrestling fan porn has never been better.

What’s going on in the business right now with people turning on each other because of the condom issue kind of reminds me of the old WCW Monday Nitro broadcasts.

Hulk Hogan, who bolted from Vince McMahon’s organization, dropped the yellow colors for black and wore grease paint five o’clock shadow. And if you didn’t belong to the Scott Hall-Kevin Nash clique [the original ring leaders of the NWO], man, you just weren’t cool.

I think no one’s going to disagree that the New World Order promotion was a thing of genius. Rob Black’s UAWA is kind of like that because it’s going to demand that you take sides.

Except Black’s UAWA are the good guys, the baby faces. That’s what he’s telling us, and Ernest Greene has just now emerged as the chief heel for the other side.

Me, I’m taking the position of Mean Gene Okerlund. I’m just the guy with the tan and the flustered expression pointing the mike in the direction of warring factions. You got something to say? Spit it out. Heidi Hollywood just did. She spit out on twitter that I was a bully for writing mean things about her.

Funny thing. I didn’t write mean things about Heidi Hollywood, a pudgy 24 year-old. I was quoting Black who had things to say about Hollywood’s sexual specialties sans condoms. Hollywood says these are all lies and made up, but Black was only reading from a promo email flyer sent out by Hollywood’s agency Ideal Image Management. So what it all proves is that Hollywood now joins a long list of morons in this business who can’t read.

When it comes to writing, now that’s a different thing. Ernest Borgnine, I mean Ernest Greene, is an erudite man of letters. And when the occasion warrants, Greene who’s been known to beat the shit out of a woman or to in his BDSM extravaganzas can make Cal/OSHA women cry with the best of ’em.

Which Greene did at an industry meeting years ago, and kind of put this industry on the defense to begin with. Because, after that fiasco, Michael Weinstein got up in arms over AIM and eventually spearheaded the Measure B movement. So thank you Ernest Greene for all you’ve contributed to the safe sex debate.

Greene this week decided to go after another woman, Tristan Taormino. I don’t know what got Greene’s goat more, the fact that Taormino’s getting all the media attention Nina Hartley used to garner, or the fact that Taormino adopted a condoms policy.

Greene informs us that Taormino was once his protégé and friend, but no more. To put that comment in its proper perspective, there’s a story today on the front page of the LA Times. It’s about a Dodgers fan who was stabbed to death in San Francisco because he was wearing Dodgers regalia. So the fact that Greene stabs Taormino in the back over condoms, I don’t see much difference.

Joining Greene in this absurdist version of West Side Story where switchblades are the rule, rather than the exception, is none other than Dr. Gail Dines.

Always ludicrous in her thinking, Dines hates the business no matter who’s in charge but it’s surprising that she, too, would be critical of Taormino. More so because Dines believes that Taormino’s got an agenda and must have some cards up her sleeve for making a switch. Dines writes: “For over a decade, Taormino has been an integral part of an industry that has shown callous disregard for the well-being of performers, one that shamelessly spits out women (and men)…”

I guess I’m silly to believe that someone like Taormino has a right to change their mind. Look at Black. He was an industry bad boy for years and once orchestrated a marketing campaign ridiculing condoms. Now, at a very trim 145 pounds, Black could slip his whole body into a rubber if he wanted to.

Greene and Hartley, that’s another story. They talk about freedom of choice. So Taormino exercises that freedom to mandate condoms and now Greene’s writing her out of his will. I don’t get it, and because of that, I’m glad I decided to retire and distance myself from this nonsense. You people are all nuts.


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