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Twas the Night B4 XXXmas

With the holidays upon us, here’s a little ditty that should bring it home for this tough time of year for the smut business. I hope you enjoy it. 😉

And now, a little XXXmas fairy tale from AdultFYI.com:

‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through porn valley
Not a porn girl was working, not even tricks in an alley;
Some male talent were hung but the movie companies didn’t care,
Because holidays in Chatsworth, there’s no money there;

The web girls were nestled in front of their PCs,
With visions of cam shows and them on their knees;
And porn fans with their cum towels, and a bottle of lube,
Stopped paying to get off, instead watched free smut on the tube,

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
One star jumped from her bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the window she flew but got bent,
When she realized it was the landlord, come to collect this month’s rent.

The moon on her breasts looked like new-fallen snow
But she soon was to become, a sad homeless ho,
When, what to her wondering eyes should appear,
But a quick gig doing anal, with male talent that’s sometimes queer,

During the rest of the year she had thought that was sick,
But now she needs work, she don’t mind shit-stained dick.
More rapid than eagles she accepted the job,
And screamed, “even at half rate, I’ll still suck on his cob”;

“Now, Jason! now, Dale! now, Nick and the others!
I’m so desperate for work, I’ll do scenes with Dick Smothers!
On top, on the bottom, throw me hard against the wall!
I’ll do Hardcore, Khan Tusion, hell, right now I’ll do them all!”

As dry heaves that before the thought of working this way,
When she met with this obstacle, who cares he was once gay,
So inside her cooch, his Liberace rod flew,
With just one reassurance that no AIM test was due.

And then, in a twinkling, she heard at the door
The bitching and whining of a real jealous whore.
As she continued her scene, and was swallowing his cum,
A female buddy of hers packed her bowl with her thumb.

In the next room, dressed all in fur, thinking she was a diva,
But after seeing her up close, damn she needed Noxema;
A bundle of stretch marks from the kid she once had,
Poked out her tube top as she really got mad.

Her eyes — how they reddened with every gonja puff!
Her ass cheeks like cottage cheese, her nose full of snuff!
Her droll little mouth had seen better days,
And she fantasized about Hendrix in her own Purple Haze;

The stump of her bowl in her mouth like a pig,
And the smoke encircled her head, while mad her friend had a gig;
She had an idea to distract her from her own lack of work,
She checked if the film crew, on the side, wanted a jerk.

When a chubby and plump director said yes,
She thought her rent too was paid, at least that was her guess;
With a stroke and a pull as he grabbed this girl’s head,
Soon her skills were in question because his dick, it was dead;

He spoke not a word, but went straight back to work,
And she asked him for money; for her time with his quirk,
He layed his finger for silence, across his fat lips,
And shot a look at this crack ho, so she knew there were no tips;

She sprang to her feet, to her friend gave a warning,
Yet her buddy was working and knew she had a home in the morning.
But I heard her exclaim, ere she stormed off the set,

“FUCK YOU!”
 

 

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