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Vivid Casts UCLA Racist Alexandra Wallace in ‘String Thongs and Ding Dongs’ Opposite Blackie Chan

from www.laweekly.com – Who said “Asians in the Library” hottie Alexandra Wallace wouldn’t be able to land a job?

L.A. porn king Vivid Entertainment, apparently tired of knocking down Octomom’s door for a train-wreck celebrity cameo, made a trip to Wallace’s Sacramento home last week — hoping to catch the infamous co-ed in a vulnerable moment while her peers enjoyed a wet ‘n’ wild Spring Break down in Cancun.

Vivid recruiter Michael Wu tells the Weekly that initially, when he offered Wallace a starring role in her own adult film, the former political-science major was hesitant to accept. But after some words of encouragement from her father…

… Wallace decided it would be the best thing for the UCLA community “and the entire Asian culture.”

Vivid revealed in a statement this morning that the film will be named after Wallace’s own YouTube-immortalized imitation of Asian speech. “String Thongs and Ding Dongs” will feature top (and only) Southern California Asian porn star Blackie Chan opposite Wallace, teaching the ignorant cutie a nice long lesson and letting a nation’s worth of library nerds release their rage vicariously.

From the porn company’s official statement:

“We’re honored to be doing our part to bring the Asian and Bimbo communities back together with ‘STDD.’ Like we always say: Make love, not racist YouTube rants. Alexandra Wallace deserves a chance to show America that she’s been able to swallow her pride and strip herself of all that negativity. … We think she’s an exciting personality.”

On her part, Wallace sent a letter to the Daily Bruin, thanking all the UCLA Asians for inadvertently helping her achieve her dreams:

If not for your rude Oriental manners in the library, I may have never posted my video to YouTube, and in turn may have never come to the epiphany that I’m meant to be a star.

Special thanks to to Asian advocacy groups everywhere for helping ‘Asians in the Library’ to go viral, and to Chancellor Block for the personal posse of campus police officers I was provided in my time of peril.

I deeply regret not thinking of this sooner. What a fool I’ve been.

Alexandra Wallace

Filming is set to begin as soon as next week. Insiders who got a glimpse of the “STDD” storyboard tell us some scenes may actually employ the UCLA East Asian Library as a backdrop, and make creative use of cellphones as erotic props.

All proceeds will go to the Red Cross Japan tsunami relief fund.

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