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Make Friends With Your Ass, Nina Hartley Advises Men at AEE

Las Vegas- Earlier Thursday on the AEE show floor, Tera Patrick and Evan Seinfeld, his normal whiskey voice Kentucky blended by this time, got behind the KSEX mikes at the Adam & Eve booth. Seinfeld noted that Patrick was going to be signing at the Vivid booth for 2 1/2 hours, that she was now one of the Vivid girls with her own company, Teravision, and that her website, officialterapatrick.com would be launching in five days.

Patrick said that she would also be hosting The Women Are Wild party later that evening. Wankus continued to take his informal poll of who was getting laid and who wasn’t. So far he was heading the list of the wasn’ts.

Patrick mentioned that she went by the Adam & Eve booth and picked up a copy of Carmen Luvana’s movie Rawhide. “They gave me this insane pocket rocket. It’s insanely powerful. I put it on my stomach, I put it everywhere.” Not to mention when Nicole Sheridan put the toy in her mouth and went down on Patrick at the booth. “She’s like rubbing her clit and all kinds of stuff,” reported Wankus. “The beautiful Nicole Sheridan tearing up Tera Patrick live at KSEX here at Adam & Eve’s booth.”

Patrick said she had also been at the Playerz Ball with Clubjenna. “It was really awesome. Jenna got an award.” Patrick said she’ll be having three movies coming out in the next few months. Seinfeld figured around April or May.

Tim Case and Felicia Fox then followed up with a mini-show. Fox had just been signing at EvolutionErotica and brought back one of the directors, Guy Capo, for a chat. Capo did two of the best features of the year that weren’t nominated- American Gunk along with Sex, Drugs and Rock ‘n’ Roll. “The girls from Sex, Drugs & Rock ‘n’ Roll, some of Tommy’s films, they’re all hanging out ovger there [at the Evolution booth],” said Capo who was floored with the proceedings, this being his first ever trade show. Case asked if it was true that they had girls at the booth auditioning male talent. “it’s not going on at the booth but somewhere in the adjacent vicinity we’ve got things going on,” he said.

Nina Hartley who was there to sign for Adam & Eve, also got on mike. Hartley said she was enjoying her 20th consecutive CES, a fete Cal Ripken can’t even claim. Fox said she’s been watching Hartley’s Guide to Anal Sex, hasn’t practiced it mind you, but has been watching it. Hartley said it’s a practice you can’t begin in an evening that you have to work up to it over months. Fox said usually when she’s drunk, Case tries to stick a thumb up her ass. “That’s not my thumb!” Case laughed. Hartley said it always amazes her when guys do that. “They say well, maybe I can get it in and she won’t notice. Maybe she won’t be able to tell that I’m an eighth of an inch away from my ass. We can tell, guys, We can tell.”

As far as advice to anal virgins, Hartley said, “It should never hurt. Butt sex should never hurt. It should be nothing but fun. And lots of lube.” Hartley also advised men to become friends with their ass first as a matter of empathy. Case said he really didn’t want to become friends with his ass, first. “The ass is something you earn,” said Hartley. “She just can’t give it to you.”

Hartley said the agreement with her man is that he can play with her butt whenever he wants, but he can’t fuck her butt until it wants. “It’s his job to make it want it.” Case wanted to know if he was friends with his ass. “Friendly enough,” answered Hartley. “You don’t have to take a locomotive there to have empathy.

“For a guy to be with me,” Hartley continued, “if I start licking behind your balls, your knees go up, not down. Think about rolling on your back, go with it. Go with it.” Case then take a ration of shit when her forgot the url to Fox’s website.

In a follow-up segment Wankus and Katie Morgan took to the mikes. Kiki D’Aire was their guest and Wankus hinted that Kiki might become a KSEX p-jay in the near future. “I’ll be the next chick that’s not giving it up to a certain p-jay. It’s like Vegas,” D’Aire continued. “Whatever goes on in Wankus’ office, stays in Wankus’s office.” It was noted that D’Aire and Morgan have yet to work together. “Fond a gig and you guys can do a scene together,” Wankus told her, mentioning that Morgan is gay for pay and would be up to the task. In his informal sex-in-Vegas poll, Wankus learned that D’Aire had drunk sex. “We got in at 2:30 this morning and decided we needed to go get wasted.”

Wankus then talked to Kim Chambers. Chambers said she was at the show by herself. Wankus asked if that meant she was available. “I’m always available,” said Chambers. “You wanna fuck?” Chambers noted that Wankus’ cock was really hard and Kylie Ireland chimed in saying those were his keys. Asked if she had ever worked with Ireland, Chambers said she played naked twister with Ireland for St. Patty’s Day in a bizarre schematic that wound up with dildos in one another’s asses. Chambers also said she was currently doing fitness competitions.

Next on the air, Kurt Lockwood lent his heartfelt condolences to Wankus as a Miami Dolphins fan. Lockwood, who’s up for four nominations, brought up the bet Wankus has with Tyler Faith in which Faith would give him a blowjob and swallow if the New England Patriots get knocked off before the Super Bowl. Lockwood, himself, was doing some signings at the Hustler booth and said he was keeping the fact that he was doing scenes on the down-low. “Editorially speaking, I would never admit that, yes, I shot two scenes at the Bellagio the last two nights,” Lockwood said.
 

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