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On Prime TimeUncensored: MonAvie, Mon Ami

Porn Valley- Marco…Rossi. Marco…Rossi.

It sounded like the kids’ swimming pool game for a moment as Vanessa Blue had male performer Marco Rossi on her PrimeTimeUncensored show, www.primetimeuncensored.com, Friday night.

Except Blue might as well have had Martini & Rossi on, because Marco was there to talk, not about porn hijinx and d.p.s, but about drinking. A health drink, if you will, called MonAvie with Marco inviting serious comparisons to an infomercial with his non-stop foreign tinted spiel about free radicals and 80 year old men in the Amazon running around with school boy hard ons.

“I am not bullsheeting,” Marco kept repeating while conveying the purported affects of MonAvie in an accent generally adopted by snooty French waiters. Or at least one caller-in thought so

“Is that how they do it in France?” questioned a woman, identifying herself as Tonisha.

“I am Hungarian!” Marco replied, somewhat indignantly.

Asked if MonAvie might be mixed with Bacardi, Marco thought that might somehow defeat the medicinal purposes of it.

Wound up like a pyramid club meeting attendee, Marco, doing a Ponce DeLeon, swears he’s tapped into the fountain of youth with this stuff. MonAvie, packaged like a Bordeaux, goes for something like $32 bucks a bottle.

For a blend of 19 exotic fruits, most of which you’ve never heard of, that’s a pretty hefty price tag for a non-high. Which, for the dough, one might reasonably expect a cure for baldness and bowel cancer with the first sip. The drink, exhibiting a pomegranate-like flavor, has a light, salty aftertaste and certainly invites refills.

“Give yourself 20 years to drink it,” Marco urged the PTU audience, which, if you do the math at a conservative half a bottle a day comes out to $117,000 and change. Which probably sounds good to Marco because he’s grabbing a franchise for himself and hopes to cash in to the tune of $250,000 a year selling the stuff.

After the show, PTU’s Michael Fattorosi asked Marco if MonAvie makes your cum taste better.

“I don’t know- I haven’t tasted my cum,” replied Marco.

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