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Sean Looks at The Week of 10/3/2010 in Review; ASU Student is This Week’s Einstein

Sean from writes: AdultFYI goes out of its way to bring you the latest from the World of stupid…

The Court Jester award goes to Tila Tequila.

We must again deal with another D List celebrity attempting to hype a sex tape while playing the mainstream media for the fools that they appear to be.

Tila claimed this week that a former boyfriend was attempting to extort $75,000 from her or he’d release the tape. She follows the usual script to a tee: “This is extortion and my lawyers are fully aware and are fighting back by filing an injunction against him… yadda yadda yadda,” Tila said.

Of course the “injunction” was denied by a ‘judge’ on the grounds that “Tila exploits her sexuality.” Then in a last desperate attempt to suck in the mainstream press, they report that poor Tila is now suing the ex-boyfriend and celebrity sex tape hustler Kevin Blatt to stop the tape’s release.

This carnival-like sideshow could quickly be squashed as intelligent readers of this column realize that the tape can not be distributed legally without all the properly signed paperwork. I don’t know who is playing the other for fools, but I’m getting sick of the mainstream press giving any actual legitimacy to any of the dramas associated with these so-called scandalous sex tapes.

The Live Nude Girls in the Parking Lot award goes to the Playmates strip club.

For two months, officers said they gathered video and audio evidence of women stripping completely naked, touching customers and performing sexual activity for $20 to $100 at Playmates.

“They would do anything for money,” said Officer Barbara Matthews of the Cocoa Police Department. “The nudity and gratuitous sex was spilling out into the parking lot.”

The editorial staff at AdultFyi commends the fine ladies for enabling their customers to have a joyful experience at that establishment. Their work and dedication should be applauded.

Tommy Flanagan, the Pathological Liar, award goes to Devon James.

Fueled by a dimwitted mainstream press and her delusional money making scheme, Devon James and her chubby hubby have concluded quite a week.

It all began with a report which alleges that in an email, Devon threatened the life of fellow Tiger Tramp, Joslyn James: “I will never be set up like this again. Trust me I swear to you I will kill over this. Oh yeah and wait til (sic) you see what your prize has coming! Joslyn should be scared.”

Joslyn responded to this by saying, “I think she needs to know that there will be lawyers taking action against her.”

When Joslyn comes across as the levelheaded person between these two nimrods, one should start to worry. Nothing like giving police and sue happy lawyers’ evidence on a silver platter, don’t you think?

Yet later in the week the Tiger sex tape scam begins to hit a fever pitch as former Mr. Jenna Jameson, Jay Grdina, enters the fray by offering his two cents: I offered $500K before they made the deal… of course they didn’t accept it bc [because] they would have to show the tape…which doesn’t exist!

Oh, but that accusation didn’t stop the assclowns in the mainstream press from reporting that Devon had a web site now on which people could pre-order this mythical sex tape. Nor did it stop the mainstream press in publishing comments from un-named sources [turned out to be James’ husband] stating: “Mr. Tiger’s smile is unmistakable…it’s definitely his face,” the source said.

As the week continued and talk of this sex tape began to feed off itself, even more members of the peanut gallery began to chime in. As questions concerning the legality of the tape began to surface, New York Daily News quoted Devon’s chubby hubby as saying: “The release date is Oct. 15, unless Tiger’s attorneys give us push back,” he said. “But we haven’t seen or heard from them. And what are they going to do, come shoot me?” No, Tubby, but they’ll sue you into oblivion.

Devon’s ex manager, Demi Delia [known to the press as Gina “Chi Chi” Rodriguez, finally began to bring some sanity into this sex tape charade when she was quoted as saying: “Nick [Devon’s tubby hubby] knew Tiger was not in any video so he said, ‘We should find a Tiger look a like and make a tape, no one will know.’

Even with Delia’s startling revelation, the mainstream press continued to propagate the Big Lie by once again quoting Devon’s husband: “We are porn producers so why would we hire a fake Tiger Woods when we have the real guy? It is so ridiculous to suggest otherwise.”

“It was shot in the condo in Tampa, Florida, and when it is released people will be able to see it for themselves.”

Maybe the mainstream press are co-conspirators along with Devon and her husband as this story continues to unfold. Or maybe they are just looking to fill their websites with salacious content to attract readers. But any good journalist would have asked way back when talk of this sex tape business surfaced: So, Devon, do you have Tiger’s signature on a model release? No? Thanks for calling.

The Einstein award goes to Arizona St. freshman Elizabeth Hawkenson [pictured].

As the story goes, to supplement the cost of her tuition, she decided to respond to a want ad. Of course she ended up shooting an X-rated video. However, not only did she use her real name she also was video taped showing off her ASU student ID card.

Then the fun really starts: Rumors of her appearance began circulating the Internet and she says the publicity she’s gotten from the video has “been treacherous for [her].” Then she falls for porn producer scam #0001: She says she was paid $2,000 and assured the video would only appear on the part of the Web site people had to pay to see.

Way to go Einstein. You couldn’t have screwed up your porn debut any more unless you took out a full-color ad in your hometown newspaper. But don’t worry; I’m sure a multi-million dollar contract from Vivid will be arriving soon.

The Put Octomom to Work award goes to Clips4Sale and Vivid Entertainment.

Who says there isn’t any work available in Porn Valley? Well, actually there really isn’t: that is unless you’re Octomom.

This week the fetish crew over at Clips4Sale offered the baby making machine $20,000 … and all she has to do is wash her hair on camera and put up with a little tickle torture. While Vivid offered Octomom more steady work and far less skin exposure by offering to pay her $1000 a day to become a member of their production crew. Have you noticed the strange affection Papa Smurf seems to have for that woman?

The AdultFyi Hero award goes to William G. Halby.

Our hero challenged the US tax code by trying to deduct $41,000 for “therapeutic sex” and another $71,000 for “massage therapy to relieve osteoarthritis and enhance erectile function through frequent orgasms.” Also detailed in his return were assorted sexual performance aids that he also tried to deduct as medical expenses.

Sadly, Willie lost his appeal in New York State’s Tax Appeals Tribunal and now he’s on the hook for $23,000 including interest and penalties. He is our hero not only for challenging the tax code but also for his ability to afford over $100,000 in hookers a year. We can only be that sexually active at 79 years old.


> Aiden Ashley Holding a Fundraiser October 12th to Defray Medical Expenses from a BMX Accident – Read the details here:

> Former porn actress Madison Scott makes new start as Chandler, Arizona mom – She’ll be back. They all come back. Read the story here:

> NFL To Investigate Brett Favre, Jenn Sterger Penis Situation – Favre, who turns 41 Sunday, and his wife, Deanna, have been married 14 years. We’ll see if that sees 15 years. Read the story here:

> Vicky Vette Makes Her First Visit to Nightmoves Tampa in Six Years – Read the hype:

> Worker Won’t Face Charges in Porn Snafu; “He Put His Flash Drive In and All This Stuff Popped Up” – Attorney Peter Payne says he still plans to sue the blood bank on behalf of upset parents. Read the story here:

> Visits Southern California, Dr Susan Block Show Saturday Night – Read the hype:

> Ashlynn Brooke Directs Red Riding Hood XXX for New Studio, Triple X Parody – Read the hype:

> Brooke Belle Launches her web site: With Special Webcam Show – Read the hype:

> Anderson Cooper Squawks About “Gay” trailer; Universal Pictures Buckles – Anderson Cooper should be more concerned if Walgreens has Preparation H on sale or not. Read the story here:

> Adam & Eve Re-Signs Alexis Ford – Read the hype:

> Amy Fisher on Geraldo at Large on Saturday Night, October 9th – Read the hype:

> NightMoves Best MILF Performer Nominee Diamond Foxxx’s Free Time Spent With Fans – Read the hype:

> Debi Diamond Films Presents ”This Isn’t Max Hardcore, A Fem-Dom Parody” – Read the hype:

> More on the Brett Favre Penis Pics Story – The gray-haired grid great sidestepped questions yesterday…Read the story here:

> Update: Not The First Sex Scandal for the Duke Lacrosse Team – I wouldn’t be surprised if this story is a fraud. Read it here:

> Judge Rules Against Her; RadaronLine Showing Tila Tequila Sex Tape; See the Clip – After his ruling, the judge then hit Tila in the head with a watermelon full of shit. Read the story here:

> Sex superstore Fascinations arouses neighbors’ anger – “We don’t want this in our community,” Dennis said of the new “strip” mall store near Academy and Dublin boulevards in north-central Colorado Springs. Read the story here:

> Janine Files Police Report Against Jesse James – “That was the third week in a row and he is being investigated for interfering with a child custody agreement…” Read the story here:

> Bubba Radio Network, Bubba Clem Sue Devon James Over Sex Tape – “My wife isn’t even involved…So Bubba can pretty much kiss my a–.” Read the story here:

> “Let the Writer of Shrek and Aladdin Tell You How to Make Better Porn” [Another Porn Critic With No Clue] – Read Gene’s hilarious commentary here:

Sean says: This writer should also read the late Jim Holliday’s Only the Best then he might have a clue about what he’s trying to talk about.

> No Medical Deduction For Hookers and Porn, NY Judges Rule – Halby had cited “the positive health effects of sex therapy.” Amen, brother, amen. Read the story here:

> Lisa Ann Preparing for Live Show on – Read the hype:

> Jayde Nicole Wins $36,000 Settlement Against Joe Francis – “I don’t know about Francis, but this may influence others not to file baseless claims.” Read the story here:

> Tiger Woods Sex Tape ‘Real’, Says Devon James’ Husband; Rejects Claim It Was Faked – Sure it’s real. I was just telling my unicorn that the other day. Read their fantasy here:

> Brett Favre Penis Picks? He’s a “Creepy Douche,” says Model Who Got the Photos – “I just want to make it clear that I never met him, saw him, etc., because I don’t roll that way,” Sterger wrote in a Feb. 15 email to Daulerio. Read the story here:

> High Society Magazine Offers Teacher-Hooker $60,000 to Pose Nude – I had no idea they were still in business. Read the story here:

> Wife’s Lawsuit Accuses Roberto Alomar of Having Unprotected Sex with Her – “intentionally, with corrupt intent, concealed from [her] his physical condition” Read the story here:

> Duke Coed Rates Lovers; It Becomes the Latest Internet Sensation – Her parents must be proud. Read the story here:

> NightMoves Awards: X X X; The Complete Schedule – Read the story here:

> Krystal Ball, congressional candidate in Virginia, Comments on raunchy Sex photos leaked online – Ball said the photos, showing her wearing a Santa hat and simulating a sex act with her ex-husband, were taken at a costume party six years ago. Read the story here:

Sean’s Hot Politician Fuck Scale: 7

> Atlanta’s Most Notorious Stripper; FBI Used Her to Ensnare Federal Judge Jack T. Camp – She’ll never work in that profession again. Read the story here:

> Nina Hartley’s adult film career has been long, distinguished and trailblazing—and it’s far from over – Her career was over 15 years ago but nobody told her. Read the story here:

> Tiger Woods Sex Tape a Fake?; James’ Ex Manager Demi Delia Reveals the Tricks Employed – “It can’t be – because the tape does not exist,” Rodriguez told Read the story here:

> After One Porn Chick is Banned, Tera Patrick Shooting Horror Movie In Indonesia – “I cannot tell you about it. It remains a secret,” Dheeraj said Wednesday as quoted by It would appear it isn’t a secret anymore. Read the story here:

>She Didn’t Lose Her Scholarship: ASU Student Appears in Scripted, “Bullshit” Porn Video; See the Clip – Read the story here:

> Devon James and Her Husband will Probably Be Hearing from Marty “The Pitbull” Singer – Appears their little con job will be ending soon. Read the story here:

> AdultFYI Goes Deep Inside Amy Fisher; Conversations with the Former Long Island Lolita – Read Gene’s interview here:

> Update: Sasha Grey – Life After Porn and Entourage – Read the story here:

> Tiger Tape Sneak Preview: “He Is Dirty” – “Mr. Tiger’s smile is unmistakable…it’s definitely his face,” the source said. Read more about the fraud here:

> Tiger Woods Alleged Sex Tape Site, Tiger Tape, Promises Video Within Days – “Preorder here only!! Starting October 15,” announces the TigerTape site. Read the story here:

> Kentucky Anti-porn group sues over “In God We Trust” plate – Nothing but a money grab. Read the story here:

> October 14th to 17th: Joanna Angel’s Australian Tour – She better pack her American to Australian language dictionary. Read the story here:

> Octomom Offered On the Job Porn Training by Vivid- 1,000 Bucks a Day – I trust all crew members that work for Vivid get paid as much. Read the story here:

> Tampa’s Devon James: or why you should never trust a ‘porn queen’ – Read the story here:

> Bluebird’s Feature, BatFxxx Flexes Its Wings and Wins Raves – Read the hype:

> O.C. cop to be arraigned on Anal Sex assaults – If convicted, he could face up to 16 years in prison. Read the story here:

> Supreme Court Weighs In on Snyder v. Phelps; Listen to What Larry Flynt Has to Say –

> “Nails” Dykstra Envisions a Financial Comeback: “I Want to Be on the Cover of Forbes” – He has a better chance of appearing on Business Failures Weekly. Read the story here:

> Drunken driver sentenced; slammed into Portland adult business after punching ex-girlfriend – “I’ll kill you all! .¤.¤.You’re all whores in a whore house!” Read the story here:

> Sasha Grey Talks About New Mainstream Film Project, I Melt With You – When she gets nominated for an Oscar, I’ll start to care. Read the story here:

> Gail Dines Calls for a Global Anti-Porn Movement – Good luck with that. Read the story here:

> October 10: Jenna Jameson Plans Public Memorial for Her Father – Read the story here:

> Andy San Dimas and Bobbi Starr Land Roles in Mainstream Film, Drive – Porn stars must work cheap. Read the story here:

> Amateur Teen Kingdom Releases 100th DVD; Amateur Beauty Bree Daniels Featured on Cover – Read the hype:

> Larry Flynt Threatens to Out Gay Senator; [Hint: It Ain’t Lindsey Graham and We Would Have Bet Money] – Read the story here:

> Judge ‘strips’ Chippendales of bid to beef up trademark – Read the story here:

> The Ubiquitous Ron Jeremy at Tony Curtis’ Funeral – Well, it was open to the public. Read the story here:

> More On the Playmates Strip Club Bust; If Nothing Else, This Club Delivered as Promised – Read the story here:

> Joslyn James Comments About Devon James’ Death Threats – “I think she needs to know that there will be lawyers taking action against her.” When Joslyn James comes across as the logical one, that’s really saying something. Read the story here:

> Pink Lotus Streets Naporneon Dynamite – Read the hype:

> Trick and Treat: and provide Treats all month along – Read the hype:

> Jenna Jameson’s Father Dies; “I Feel Lost Without Him,” She Says – Read the story here:

> Dennis Barrie looks back on his Cincinnati obscenity trial 20 years after his acquittal – Read the story here:

> Porn studios’ copyright lawyer Kenneth Ford Interviewed: ‘I will sue’ He Says – And the lawyers get rich. Read the story here:

> Visit to Escort Website Leads to Loss of Employment, Lawsuit Involving GoDaddy, – Read the story here:

> Devon James Pulled from The NightMoves Show – ‘We knew it was only a matter of time, congrats to Nightmoves for making a smart choice.’ Read the story here:

> Jay Grdina: Tiger Sex Tape Doesn’t Exist – I offered $500K before they made the deal… Read the story here:

> Alleged Liaisons With Undercover Stripper Lead to Judge’s Arrest on Drug, Gun Charges – Agents arrested Camp shortly after the dancer gave the undercover officer $160 in cash in exchange for a plastic bag containing several blue pills…Read the story here:

> Devon James Makes Death Threats Against Joslyn James – “Trust me I swear to you I will kill over this,” Devon wrote. Read the story here:

> More Janine-Jesse James Drama Over “Made Up” MySpace Postings – She also claims she has forensic evidence her computer was hacked the day the MySpace post was made. Of course she does. Read the story here:

> Sophie Dee to walk at AIDS Walk, started new sexy auction For the Cause – Read the hype:

> Update: Supreme Court’s Refusal to Hear Entertainment Productions, Inc. v. Shelby County – The order means the Supreme Court has denied an appeal by the strip clubs of the ruling. Read the story here:

> Ron Jeremy On Prolonging a Climax; His Mainstream Career, The NightMoves Show – Read the interview here:

> Debi Diamond Films Has New Tranny Line – Read the details here:

> Update: Politico’s People Call Sex Claims “Extortion” – “Defendant’s conduct was so extreme and outrageous as to go beyond all possible bounds of decency…” Read the story here:

> Playmates Strip Club Raided; Sex Allegedly Going On in the Parking Lot – “They would do anything for money,” said Officer Barbara Matthews of the Cocoa Police Department. Read the story here:

> U.S. Supreme Court won’t hear Shelby County strip club appeal – The court’s ruling will likely make it easier for the county to begin enforcing a new regulatory system that would ban…Read the story here:

> Amber Chase, MXG Multi-Media Announce the Official and Dramatic Relaunch of – Read the hype:

> Lupe Fuentes as “Super Poosey” Trailer Receives 22,000 views in 5 Days; See the Clip – Read the hype:

> Private Media Group Enters Into Exclusive Multi-Year Online VOD Content License Agreement – Read the hype:

> Family Values Mom Claims Congressional Candidate Wanted Her to Walk Around in a Thong, Heels – Through his attorney, Ganley, a car dealer, called the allegations “extortion.” Read the story here:

> Devon James’ Mother: Somebody Needs to Stop Her – “If Tiger doesn’t stop these girls it’s going to continue and somebody needs to put their foot down somewhere.” Read the story here:

> Lethal Lipps Accuses Brian Pumper Of Doing Gay Porn – In an interview with, Lethal Lipps states that Brian Pumper is all muscle and no bite…Read the story here:

> Jeff Mullen & Scott David to throw ‘Scream Like a Porn Star Halloween Bash’ Saturday, October 30th. – After midnight- porn stars and all others will pay $20. There is no additional guest list for this event. All guests of porn stars will be required to pay admission price. Read the hype:

> Priest fired for porn may have protected confession – Plot Straight Out of a Movie – Read the story here:

> Meet Again The Japanese Dave Cummings: Shigeo Tokuda – Sales of elder porn have reportedly doubled over the past decade, now accounting for somewhere between 20 and 30 per cent of Japan’s pornography industry, which grosses $20-billion annually. Read the fairytale here:

> Study: Experimental Sex Practiced More Often Now in U.S; Era of Wham Bam Thank You Mam Over – “We have a long way to go with how comfortable we are with sex, and how honest we are about it.” Read the story here:

> Is There Even a Sex Tape of Devon James and Tiger Woods? 13 James Factoids Probably Say No – Anyone who takes Devon James seriously would do well to consider the character of this woman, and proceed with the utmost caution. Read the story here:


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