Porn Valley- Proving that age before beauty has its advantages, porn legend Fred Lincoln is certainly one of the most entertaining guests ever to grace the jock lounge at KSEX, www.ksexradio.com.

Lincoln, who cult film fans might remember from the movie Last House on the Left, was on Ginger Lynn’s show for an encore performance Monday night and had some riotous porn tales to relate including a story about director Francois Truffaut’s script girl and her hairy pussy. “I met her at the airport,” says Lincoln who went on to describe her pubic area. “It was a forest, man!” Lincoln laughed. “Wow. I said anybody ever give you head? She said, ‘Excusez moi!’ I said never mind, only kidding. Ginger asked if he went there.

“Boy, did I go there,” chuckled Lincoln. Ginger wondered if he got stuff stuck in his teeth. Lincoln said no matter how gross the sexual act you perform, you don’t care about it until after-the-fact. “Oh, my God! She pee’d on me!” To illustrate, Lincoln related a story about him and Sharon Mitchell being in Germany one time. Lincoln said Mitchell and Erica Boyer came to his room after they had been drinking all night. “We’re all loaded and we all start fucking around.” Lincoln describes Boyer as “an ass freak.”

“She’s sticking her finger up my ass,” Lincoln continued. “She’s licking it. And Sharon’s doing this and is on top of me.” Lincoln then related how he had to take a piss with Boyer mounted on his face. “I’m telling them I got to get up- I got to pee! Somebody’s got to move. They wouldn’t move. So I pee’d.”

Mitchell, according to Lincoln, didn’t stop, she just kept going. “After she came, she squatted above me and it was like somebody opened a fire hydrant. Arrrrrrrrgh.” After Boyer and Mitchell left, Lincoln had to get up and take his mattress out to the balcony.

“You should have seen the way the Germans were looking at me. Like I was the biggest pig they had ever seen in their lives. This grown man who pisses his bed. That’s the look they gave me every time I came in to get my key.”

Lincoln said he used to have so much fun with Boyer and Mitchell, that he and Boyer almost ran away together in Europe. Lincoln said Boyer had a habit of changing outfits at least 50 times. “She’s start fucking and then run inside and change.”

Lincoln recalls the first time he was in Germany with Boyer. “We were reading Interview with a Vampire and were really into this book. We were staying at this German castle.” Lincoln said there was a knock on the door. Boyer’s hair was pulled back and she had on a blue cotton nightgown and was clutching her teddy bear.

“She says to me I’m afraid can I stay with you. Sure, come on in.” Lincoln said Boyer got in bed and exposed the side of her neck urging him to bite her. Lincoln said Boyer was so hot.

“This was right after I had got cirrhosis of the liver and couldn’t drink. What she would do was we would go in a bar. She woul drink her drinks, swallow, spit in my mouth and we’d kiss. It was so fuckin’ hot.”

Lincoln said there was a time when he, Boyer, Mitchell and Amber Lynn all lived together [it was probably the last house on the left]. “And then we’d go out and pick up girls in clubs. We’d always play with everybody.”