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Week 6: Carry Me Out on a Stretcher

Perhaps feeling the euphoria from last week, a couple of Adultfyi’ers have told me with 13 games on what looks like an easy pickins schedule this week, to expect nothing but 10-3, 11-2 records.

I say no. I say this is the kind of week to expect a stretcher and that’s the theme going into Week 6. I’m guessing a 7-6 or an 8-5 to carry the day. Because nothing is as easy as it appears to be in the NFL and this would be the weekend for major calamity.

Come on, it would be just like St. Louis, 0-5, to break into the win column against Baltimore. Mainly because the Ravens couldn’t find the end zone against San Francisco last week with the help of an Indian scout.

The best game of an otherwise very mediocre bunch is New England against Dallas. Man, that should have been the Monday night game because ESPN’s truly stinking out the joint with mediocrity since it took over the reins from ABC.

Here’s this week’s schedule followed by Sean’s picks, then the Adultfyi weekly guessing game.

Sunday: Minnesota at Chicago; Miami at Cleveland; Washington at Green Bay; Cincinnati at Kansas City; Tennessee at Tampa Bay; St. Louis at Baltimore; Houston at Jacksonville; Philadelphia at NY Jets; Carolina at Arizona; Oakland at San Diego; New England at Dallas; New Orleans at Seattle

Monday: NY Giants at Atlanta

Sean’s Picks:

Cincinnati over Kansas City – Miss Nude World [livestock division] and KSEX guest, Miss Bunny, likes the Bengals by seven and has yet to figure out that any press is good press.

Jacksonville over Houston – Chico Wang likes the Jaguars and reports that he just finished shooting a great three-way between Savannah, Shauna Grant and John Holmes.

Cleveland over Miami – Having just paid a visit the David Hans Schmidt memorial dumpster, home boy Kevin Blatt likes the Browns by 10 over the Dolphins.

Baltimore over St. Louis – Media moth #1, Luke Ford, likes the Ravens by 7 and any chance he gets to downgrade anything that involves the adult industry.

Chicago over Minnesota – Failed NASCAR driver, Brian Surewood, likes the Bears by a field goal.

Philadelphia over Jets – Anita Cannibal likes Eagles and singing to Cal-OSHA.

Tennessee over Tampa – Media moth #2, Bill Margold, likes the Titans and any opportunity he gets to throw the porn industry under the bus.

Arizona over Carolina – Mickey G. likes the Cardinals by 3 and says Brian Surewood will be a great cellmate.

Green Bay over Washington – Liking any beer that comes in a pack, Skeeter Kerkove has Green Bay by 17 and admitting to past felonies.

San Diego over Oakland – The Grand Vizier likes the Chargers by 10 and says that Brian Surewood will soon be releasing a song titled, “Cut Me A Deal.” The DEA, LAPD, DOJ, and Cal-OSHA promise to give it a listen.

Seattle over New Orleans – Kirk Lockwood likes the Seahawks by 10 and says he says Spain is highly overrated for it tacos.

Giants over Atlanta – Ron Jeremy likes the Giants by 7 and says he is putting together a national registry of all-you-can-eat buffets.

New England over Dallas- – Guessing that there’s at least 37 guys on the roster that she’s slept with, Tyler Faith thinks New England will make an abortion of Dallas and said that I should come to Boston in the spring time.

Karl the Birdman [53-23]: Baltimore, Chicago, Cleveland, Washington, Jax, Cincy, Philly, Tennessee, Arizona, NE, San Diego, Seattle, NY Giants

Sean, www.pornlegends.com: [50-26]: Baltimore, Chicago, Cleveland, GB, Jax, Cincy, Philly, Tenn, AZ, NE, SD, Seattle, NY Giants

Dan Davis [49-27]: Baltimore, Chicago, Miami, GB, Houston, Cincy, Philly, Tenn, AZ, NE, SD, Seattle, NY Jets

Billy the Crystal [48-28]: Baltimore, Chicago, Cleveland, GB, Houston, Cincinnati, NY Jets, Tenn, Arizona, Dallas, SD, Seattle, NY Giants

Gene Ross [46-30]: Baltimore, Chicago, Cleveland, Washington, Jax, Cincy, Philly, Tenn, Arizona, NE, SD, Seattle, NY Giants

Tony Batman [46-30]: Baltimore, Chicago, Cleveland, GB, Houston, Cincy, Philly, T Bay, Carolina, NE, SD, Seattle, NY Giants

Steve Seidman [45-31]: Baltimore, Chicago, Cleveland, GB, Jax, Cincinnati, Philly, Tenn, Arizona, NE, SD, Seattle, NY Giants

Jack Spade [45-31]: Baltimore, Chicago, Cleveland, GB, Jax, Cincy, NY Jets, T Bay, Arizona, NE, SD, Seattle, Atlanta

Indiana Adam: [45-31]: Baltimore, Chicago, Cleveland, GB, Jax, Cincy, Philly, TBay, AZ, NE, SD, NO, NY Giants

Mike Dickinson [44-32]: Baltimore, Chicago, Cleveland, GB, Jax, Cincy, Philly, Tennessee, AZ, NE, SD, NO, NY Giants

John Gray [44-32]: Baltimore, Chicago, Cleveland, GB, Jax, Cincy, Philly, Tenn, Az, NE, SD, Seattle, Atlanta

Willie D. [44-32]: Baltimore, Minnesota, Cleveland, GB, Jax, Cincy, Philly, T Bay, Arizona, NE, SD, NO, NY Giants

Ryan from Jerry’s Deli [43-33]: Baltimore, Chicago, Cleveland, GB, Houston, Cincy, NY Jets, Tennessee, Carolina, NE, SD, Seattle, NY Giants

Mastrick [43-33]: Baltimore, Chicago, Cleveland, Washington, Jax, KC, Philly, Tenn, AZ, NE, SD, Seattle, NY Giants

Tim Case [43-33]: Baltimore, Chicago, Cleveland, Green Bay, Jax, Cincinnati, NY Jets, Tampa Bay, Arizona, New England, SD, Seattle, NY Giants

Sandy Bunz, www.sandybunz.com [41-35]: Baltimore, Chicago, Cleveland, GB, Jax, Cincy, NY Jets, Tennessee, Carolina, NE, Oakland, Seattle, Atlanta

Wankus [41-35]: St. Louis, Minnesota, Miami, Washington, Jax, KC, NY Jets, T Bay, AZ, NE, Oakland, Seattle, NY Giants

Serenity, www.serenity.net [40-36]: Baltimore, Chicago, Cleveland, Washington, Jax, KC, NY Jets, Tennessee, AZ, NE, SD, NO, NY Giants

Brian Wallace [38-38]: St. L, Chicago, Cleveland, GB, Houston, Cincy, NY Jets, TBay, Carolina, Dallas, Oakland, Seattle, Atlanta

Steve Lane, www.serenity.net [37-39]: St. Louis, Minnesota, Cleveland, GB, Houston, KC, Philly, Tenn, AZ, NE, Oakland, NO, Atlanta

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