Porn News

69 Is Just A Number Right?

BURBANK, CA – It’s not because their team is called ‘The Porn Stars’ …it’s not because they’re sponsored by and says so on their shirts…but some local conservative in Burbank filed a complaint with City Hall regarding the jerseys that belong to the adult industry represented co-ed softball team.

After winning Game One last Sunday, the Porn Valley team consisting of stars like Amber Lynn, Katie Morgan, Rebecca Love and Ann Marie, to name a few, received notice that their uniforms were in question with at least one local resident who decided that the number “69” on the back of all the jerseys was inappropriate for this generally family friendly league.

“The Parks and Rec office contacted me,” team manager Wankus told, “they said the numbers on the back of our jerseys sparked controversy and that someone complained to City Hall that #69 has a sexual connotation to it.”

Wankus wrote back to the Parks and Rec office with the following e-mail:

Next time someone complains about the jersey numbers, direct them to the professional athletes who wear the same numbers:

Superbowl bound Carolina Panthers Star – Jordon Gross – Jersey #69

Miami Dolphins Star – Keith Sims – 1990-97 – Jersey #69

NY Yankees Stars – Bob Geren, Scott Bradley, Clay Parker, Jerry Kenney, Alan Mills – Jersey #69

Ridiculous! These are people who probably get torn apart inside because their husbands or boyfriends are on the same field ogling at adult stars and they’re looking for anything to make it go away.

The jerseys are classy, tasteful and standard. The team behavior is Brady Bunch, like any other team. The only thing different about some of our players is that they make skin flicks.

I don’t think City Hall wants to get into a public discrimination fight. I hope they let it go.


When asked if Wankus would battle the City of Burbank if they made the team change the jerseys he said, “Are you kidding me? We’d go straight to :60 minutes. Not only would I love the press, I’d love the confrontation based on the freedom of speech rights we all have. Let’s not forget, they’re not bitching about the KSEX part…they don’t like the number 69. If 69 is just a number, it’s the person viewing it sexually that’s the pervert, not the people wearing it. Have that person banned from the park for their immoral thoughts. The people at Parks and Rec are all good folks who are fair and very nice, they just have to respond when conservative morons voice their complaints. I’m sure this will go away!”

The Porn Stars play Game Two this Sunday at 4:45pm @ Olive Field in Burbank. As of right now, Burbank Parks and Rec has decided to let them play wearing the current uniforms.

“Someone had a good suggestion,” KSEXradio Daisy said, who also plays on the team, “next year the girls should all wear the number 6 and the guys wear the number 9. This way it’s not offensive unless we’re standing together.”



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