From www.adultcybermart.com – If you had plans for Saturday you might want to cancel them.

Because, according to Boulder, Colorado native and Internet preacher, Harold Camping, May 21st is the end. The end as in THE END. As in, no more, fade to black, that’s it, fuhgedddaboudit.

Me, I’m subscribing to the Mayan calendar which gives us until December of next year to square up beefs with thy neighbor and make good with the IRS. But Camping says otherwise, that we’ll all be toast come this weekend. Literally.

“The whole universe is going to be destroyed by fire,” predicted crackpot Camping.

Camping created this elaborate, extraterrestrial formula based on bible verses to calculate the day the world ends. He uses rather bizarre mathematical relationships that are tied to one date, the date of the flood from Noah’s Ark [his calculated date] and the fact that God supposedly works in thirds as in the Three Great Tribulations.

Apparently we’re at the end of the Third One which began May 21 1988 and ends Saturday.

I’ve seen the diagrams of these calculations and both Einstein and Stephen Hawking would be playing with their lips trying to figure them out.

[Hawking just created a lot of heat for himself with the Christian Right by stating that heaven was “a fairy story for people afraid of the dark” so he might not be a good example under current circumstances.]

What Camping does, proves you can use math to support almost any idiotic thesis or conspiracy. But Camping goes one better. He also employs loads of quotes from the Book of Daniel and the Book of Revelations to support his findings.

Except, he forgets the one quote advising us all to beware of false prophets, like himself.

This isn’t the first time the 89 year-old Camping has employed his Chicken Little stunts. He previously predicted the Rapture in 1994, and he may have been correct on that score because the most rapturous hookers I ever met came to my front door that year.

If anyone had known about these predictions and taken them to heart, it certainly would have been J. Handy. Handy’s the guy who heads up all these adult entertainment expos like Exxxotica Miami plus those in New York, Los Angeles and Chicago.

The fact that Handy’s got a show itinerary that extends through the year proves to me that porn must know a lot more about the end of times than Camping.

And I’m sure that AVN, if it’s still around, will optimistically schedule a show in January, 2012. And, let’s not forget, the Free Speech Coalition has got a big talent meeting set for the end of this month. Plus, no better expert on the future of porn than XBiz, has a Chicago Summit set for June. Al Capone used to hold Chicago Summits as well until the Apocalypse named Eliot Ness came along.

When it came to extortion and racketeering no entity was better at it than the Capone mob in its heyday. Which is why Handy’s Exxxotica Miami has garnered more than some attention this year because ICM Registry is one of its sponsors.

Why Handy would invite the devil to the doorstep has everything to do with money. ICM represents a lot of it and is hoping to sell the .XXX domain idea to the porn industry one person at a time if needs be.

In the simplest possible case scenario, no one can come up with any plausible reason why having a .XXX domain name is good for a porn company or the industry. It singles you out by telling the Feds you’re running a shady operation and exacts massive tribute [as much as $300] on the fear that someone will step in and swipe your brand name.

Because James Bartholet was once a merry mainstreamer who has crossed over to the dark side, I asked him why he and his Galaxy Entertainment PR entourage is lending their tacit support to the .XXX domain enterprise by appearing at Exxxotica Miami.

“I don’t have anything against these guys,” says Bartholet.

“They’re just doing their job. I’m not too involved in the politics of this thing, I’ve got to admit. We’re going there. We have the signings. We have the fans that are looking forward to seeing this, and I’ve got all the girls coming down. I’ve read the stuff about people being unhappy, but I can’t walk away from this thing. I don’t think the girls want to walk away from this thing, either.

“I doubt whether any of the girls or myself will be looking to buy .XXX domains,” Bartholet continues.

“Seriously, that isn’t going to happen. I don’t think they’ll be going around like salesmen and trying to sell us at every booth. We’re going there for the fans and will put politics aside. I’m trying to rise above all of that.”

Attorney Michael Fattorosi who reps Exxxotica Miami has an interesting take.

“I don’t see how .XXX is going to survive,” states Fattorosi.

“I don’t see people in the industry getting behind it at all. It will be interesting to see how that plays out, but from everything I’ve read, no one’s buying a .XXX name. They just refuse to do it. I just don’t think they’ll be able to make it mandatory. I don’t think that Congress or the Senate will push it to make it mandatory. That would legitimize the industry and I don’t see that happening. As it is now, companies don’t buy the .nets or the .orgs.”

Asked what would anyone done with a .XXX if they already own a dot.com, Fattorosi suspects, “You would just use it as a re-direct to your already existing sites.”

A pretty expensive re-direct.