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Jenna Almost Buys the Farm

Porn Valley- Earlier this week I brought up the subject of Smells Like Sex, perhap the most snake bitten porn movie ever made. And an excerpt from Jenna Jameson’s book How To Make Love Like a Porn Star only illustrates just what a mess it truly was. Jameson notes that the movie was produced by AVN in collaboration with VCA and she was asked to star in it, discounting the fact that an original version had already been shot and discarded, ala The Exorcist 4 which premiers this Friday.

Jameson says she was a week into the Smells Like Sex shooting and had just done a scene with Kylie Ireland, Felicia and Vince Voyeur. That night she came down with a sore throat. Jameson discarded the warning signs but by the end of the shoot her throat was swollen and she could barely hold a conversation. Jameson looked into a mirror to discover huge white lumps all over her throat. But because she was new to L.A., Jameson said she really didn’t know what to do or where to go much less be able to rely on a friendly face.

Jameson remembers knocking on the door of an older couple who were her neighbors. It was about 9pm and they sent her to a nearby clinic. By the time a doctor looked at Jameson it was two hours later. He told her she had a strep throat. Jameson told him she was allergic to most antibiotics but he, nevertheless, prescribed Biaxin which she took and got an allergic reaction to it. As soon as Jameson’s head hit the pillow, she writes that she broke out in hives and that her arms, legs and fingers began to swell. According to her, she looked like an extra in Shallow Hal with chicken pox. She says that her tongue was also completely swollen and that her skin began peeling as though she had been sunburned. “Then an itchy red rash grew around my nose and mouth,” she states.

Jameson describes the sensation of going to the bathroom as though it were an open wound doused with salt water. And when she went to wipe herself, her skin began coming off in sheets. By this time her body chemistry was running so erratic that she remembers passing out cold and knocking her head on the toilet seat. By the time she awoke, Jameson crawled to her living room to look for a number she could dial. According to Jameson, it never dawned on her to try 9-1-1 but the number she did find was Brad Armstrong’s whom she refers to throughout in the book by his real name.

Armstrong, who had been trying to date her at this time, showed up at Jameson’s door within minutes. By now Jameson was convulsing, and Armstrong took her to the North Hollywood Medical Center. Immediately they put her on a gurney, hooked her up to an IV and paged a doctor.

Jameson remembers the doctor slamming a six inch needle with cortisone in her thigh. She was told that her airway was within 15 minutes of being completely closed and that she would have suffocated to death. Jameson said such was her allergic reaction that she couldn’t work for at least another six weeks. Realizing that it was someone on the set that had given her strep throat, Jameson finally discovered that it had been Ireland who owned up to giving it to her.


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