The Minion writes on www.theminionplanet.com – I just turned 31 and I’ve been riding the nostalgic train. Recently, this blog was featured on AdultFYI and the interview with Gene Ross brought up a ton of memories.

from www.adultcybermart.com – When Inkyo Volt Hwang, aka Chico Wang, was still alive and pissing off people with his caustic and insensitive Oriental wit on Lukeisback.com, “The Minion” served as his go-fer, second banana and operatic understudy. It was like a fraternity initiation and not a pleasant one.

Puzzlingly, here was a grown man doing Chico’s somewhat unorthodox bidding. All for a chance to be in the industry, claims The Minion, and we were re-hashing some of those crazy stories in a chat we had this week.

And so The Minion has joined the ranks of porn’s bloggers and can be found at www.theminionplanet.com where he relates some of those madcap exploits.

“I decided that every other Joe Shmoe has a blog so why not,” The Minion explains, noting that though he’s a few years behind in the game doing this, he might as well try making money off his name.

“I looked at other sites and the design for this had to be a little bit different,” he continues.

The Minion launched just recently after having registered the domain two years ago.

“It wasn’t something I thought about when Chico Wang was above ground,” he muses.

The Minion has been helping out Billy Watson on Watson’s site, www.ishootporn.com and figured it was now or never as far as diving into the shark tank. A friend designed the page for him whereas The Minion confesses that he “can’t design shit”.

“But I like to think the content will speak for itself. Just the wacky shit and I’ll have some videos put up soon.”

The Minion and I trade some nostalgia and he remembers the old days of generossextreme.com when I’d interview porn chicks like Plenty Up Top [I had sex with her the night of that interview in fact].

“Chico used to run the Extreme paysite and Extreme used to own XPW, the wrestling company,” recalls The Minion.

“I went there on a day off to post flyers for them [XPW]. Chico was digitizing some video. We just shot the shit and he was a little drunk. That’s surprising!! I think he was chasing some kid around with some three-foot double headed dildo. It was weird and we got to talking. Then I started following him when he went over to LukeisBack.

When he posted that he needed a Minion, I thought let me give it a shot. I’ve always liked porn. He finally brought me on board.”

The Minion immediately assumed the role of the patsy and the fall guy, and Chico was always having his way with him.

“But it wasn’t like me saying make me look like Curly Howard,” The Minion chuckles.

“I didn’t take it personal because he did it to a lot of people. It was all about the content.”

You also have to remember. Chico was one insane guy. The Minion agrees.

“When I started working with him I had no idea that he pistol-whipped a girl and I guess kidnapped her. I read some of the transcripts. At the time I didn’t know any of that. I guess you can say he didn’t like women that much.”

When I first met Chico he was a very shy guy and that’s the same story The Minion heard.

“Eventually, as he got some power he shit on whoever he could.”

Which is the sad truth.

“I did learn a lot from the guy and he trusted me with a lot of stuff by shooting behind the scenes and doing paperwork and getting douches,” The Minion continues.

“Again, he probably didn’t feel like doing it himself. But this wasn’t a totally negative experience. I’m not going to tarnish his legacy that way. I did learn a lot and met a lot of people and got my dick sucked a lot! There were a lot of positives.

“The first month I was with Chico I did a test run. Working with Mason Storm was my real initiation. Chico had me wearing adult diapers. She pee’d on me and I eventually got to pop on her. With Chiquita Lopez I had to eat pizza off her back as I was banging her doggie-style. It was kind of an awkward scene but we got through it. Progressively it got more insane and so did he.”

“I looked at it this way,” continues The Minion.

“I had no technical experience. I had never been on a set. He’s taking a chance on me and it would look horrible if I ran with my tail between my legs. I said fuck it, I’ll try it. Eventually I got to the point where I didn’t mind playing the dopey guy. I think I cornered the market on stupid.”

From everything he’s heard, The Minion wishes he had been at Extreme. It was certainly the wackiest two years of my life.

“I heard it was like the training ground,” he says.

“I kept hearing stories about how Rob Black cut two different color checks. [The ones that were guaranteed to bounce and the ones that would clear.]

The last scene The Minion performed in was about five years ago with De Bella.

The Minion worked closely with Chico until the day the troubled director committed suicide in a hotel room www.adultfyi.com/read.php?ID=42306

“He was a totally different guy by then,” reflects he Minion.

“He hated this person; he hated that person. Haley Paige was apparently back on heroin and I think Chico said he spent $100,000 to get Haley off it. A makeup artist had gotten her back on it, and Chico hated her for that. This was a little bit after he got fired or left from Diabolic.

“The last time I saw him he looked really bad and the next morning I got a call that Chico got arrested. I thought it was another DUI, and Chico relayed me a message to go to the apartment he and Haley were sharing and to make sure her and her mom weren’t taking any of his computer stuff and tapes out of there.

“But that was the last time I saw him. The day he was found dead was the day I remember reading something for the first on the computer or the news and literally saying out loud, ‘holy shit!’

“At that point he had been missing for six weeks or so. For the most part, at the risk of alienating some people I’m kinda happy he’s gone.”

At the time of Chico’s suicide, The Minion was helping out www.dogfart.com and continues working with them. [“They’ve been good to me as well as www.blacksonblondes.com I can’t complain.”]

“The first thing I thought was Chico faked his death,” says The Minion.

“He had that Andy Kaufmanesque way about him. The first thing I did, I called the morgue and asked for confirmation. They said, yeah, the body was there.”

The thing also about Chico is you never got a straight answer from him, and hence never knew what the conflicting story was.

“He was a weird guy that way,” The Minion agrees.

“He always said his family owned apartment buildings and that they would kill him if they found out what he did. He told me he told them he was a computer repair man, something like that. I didn’t think much of it.”

If there was one crazy, insane moment The Minion shared with Chico it was the time they got held up by three armed Hispanics.

“We were renting a house off of Topanga Canyon. We were shooting there, and it was our base of operations. At that point he had a million enemies. One day I came in and we were supposed to go to the office to drop off paperwork. I was sitting in the living room and two Hispanic guys came in. They had their guns drawn. Then a third guy came in. They had no masks on, but they had guns.

“I looked at them and said oh shit. They put me on the floor, on my stomach and tied me up. They used blue painters’ tape but did a really shitty job of tying me up. Then they got Chico. He showed them around the house and they took everything worth money.

“They took my keys. They took my wallet, computers, TVs, Xboxes; anything worth money. It was needless to say, scary. The guns were real and it was no prank. We called the cops, and they dusted for prints. But the problem is half of Porn Valley shot in that house at one point or another so they never caught the guys. It’s something I still think about.”