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Bisexual Britni: Dennis Would Beat Me

Check out this story www.adultfyi.com/read.php?ID=23335 before reading the following: Bisexual Britni as “Bessi” writes on http://freebessi.livejournal.com about her former partner, Dennis:

# There were also instances, though fairly uncommon, when he beat me with his fists. These beatings usually involved choking as well. Choking and punching were things that he did that were physical, but he didn’t do them often. He much preferred to do things that wouldn’t leave marks and that I couldn’t prove. I’m not quite sure why he ever doled out the actual beatings; I assume even a sociopath occasionally loses his temper.

# He PUPPETTEERED my entire life and my every contact with everyone, including my family. The revelation of his puppet mastery or screwing up his scripted plans for his stage would lead back to *TATAAP. [THE ALL-ENCOMPASSING TORTURE AND ABUSE PUNISHMENT]

# I was blamed for EVERYTHING, including his own discrepancies in his diet and exercise routine. I was blamed for his lack of friendships and his lack of a job (which he still does not have). He said that he “sacrificed” these things to be with me, so that he could “baby-sit” me all the time. I was blamed for him not continuing his schooling, as well. His primary job was to “baby-sit” me so that I didn’t leave him (which I did attempt to do, frequently).

# I had NO contact with anyone on my own. I never had a private phone conversation or a private IM conversation or email. I was always supervised during any contact with anyone, even Michelle. I had no phone numbers in my phone but Dennis’s and possibly my Mom’s. Any attempt to contact someone on my own was seen as “sneakiness” and was rewarded with immediate *TATAAP.

# I was not allowed out of the house, not even for food, at times. This was not ALWAYS true; sometimes, he allowed me to go to the 7-11 or something for a snack, but first he would go through my entire purse and all of my pockets to make sure I wasn’t planning an “escape”. He would make me leave something important home, such as my ID. I certainly did not leave the house to hang out with friends, and would have to tell them that it was my own decision not to go out with them; not his. I had to constantly blame my lack of freedom on myself and my own reasons, rather than on the control he was imposing upon me. If I even inferred that he’d had anything to do with why I couldn’t go somewhere or do something, it was *TATAAP. We also had an alarm system. He flat out admitted it was simply to keep things “in, not out”. If I even cracked the door, he’d come rushing to the site (it said “front door, back door, basement window” and everything) and then I’d be in trouble for trying to scare him. That didn’t happen much, however, since I wasn’t often allowed to leave whatever room he was currently in, and if I did, I had to explain where I was going, what I was doing in that room and why. An attempt to leave the house when not given permission was instant *TATAAP.

# He constantly threatened beating me and *TATAAP and frequently threatened my life. He threatened to “track me down” if I ever left him, and if I ever became “useless to him”, he would have no qualms about extinguishing my life. This was put out as a joke. He constantly “joked” about my life ending “accidentally” at his hands. He constantly “joked” about his desire to have me dead, and how it would benefit him, such as getting insurance money and being able to write a book about my life and “tragic death”. He constantly “joked” about how I should be wary of his activities regarding his plots and plans to extinguish my life. It was just a fucking joke.

He did not ever acknowledge that any abuse or torture ever occurred; even DURING the torture, I would beg him to stop and he would say, “Stop what?” This was his reference to the fact that what he did did not leave marks and that no one would ever know about it. He would laugh at me and mock me about that very fact, and have conversations with me about how I could never prove that he did anything, especially saying things like, “Luckily, psychological torture doesn’t leave bruises, ha-ha.”

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