Porn Valley- Brian, Cytherea’s significant other, made a Super Bowl bet with Wankus which he failed to keep this week. If the New England Patriots won, Brian would have to come on The Wanker show, www.ksexradio.com and jerk off, not on Wankus’ face, but his picture. If the Eagles won, it would have been the other way around with Wankus whacking off on Brian’s picture on Cytherea’s show.

Joining Brian in the no-show department was newcomer Maddison Knox who Wankus kept announcing as coming on the show. But Knox never made it. Knox, who agreed to an appearance several weeks previous, joins a list of performers on the KSEX flake list which includes Bridgette Monroe who has been on KSEX in the past and will be on Young & The Curious tonight with Jason Sechrest, www.jasoncurious.com . Technically, Monroe flaked when she was working under the name Hunter Scott. [Since we posted this item, Monroe has since cancelled her appearance and will be replaced by Daphne Rosen.]

But filling in, humorously, for Knox was Jerry, the sales manager from Stardust Industries, www.stardustindustries.com

The last time Jerry was on KSEX was to do The Temptation Show at 10 pm [PST] of which he’s becoming something of a regular. But Jerry got so plastered, Lorrainiac had to call him a cab to take him home from the station. Except Jerry wound up disappearing and everyone was going APB nuts wondering what happened to him.

Wankus’ conversation with Jerry pretty much picked up from that point with Wankus busting Jerry’s balls. As Wankus introduced Jerry, Tyler Faith the evening’s co-ho, had no idea who Stardust was. “It’s a great company that supplies all kinds of [adult] toys, games and products,” Wankus explained. Faith said her favorite toy is an egg-shaped vibrator. “It takes about 30 seconds.”

Noting that he wasn’t drunk yet, Jerry came armed with a basket of Valentine’s Day-related goodies. Faith’s dog, Rocco, immediately growled and Wankus suspected that it was Jerry’s wild mane of a hairdo inciting the animal to riot. Jerry explained that on Lorrainiac’s show, later in the evening, they were giving a listener the gift basket. Wankus then started on Jerry about his resemblance to Geraldo Rivera. “How do you take so much abuse, Jer?”

Jerry also had a toy of the fancy variety- batteries not included- to give Faith, Faith noting that the toy company JKP signed with were “very cheap” and don’t give the girls any toys. “Not only have I not seen any checks, they don’t even give us any fuckin’ toys.” Wankus did an oh boy, and Faith replied that she didn’t give a shit.

“It’s fucked up, though,” said Faith commenting on a conversation she had with JKP publicist Scott Hoover.. “I said I need some toys for work- for our scenes. So he called them. They were like, ah, then he called somebody else who’s like a nice company and I wish I remembered it. They sent them to us right away. Not even the company we were fucking signed with.”

Wankus gave Jerry a what the fuck about the batteries. “If you bring batteries chances are the girl would try it out for you.” Jerry also brought Faith the Tabitha Stevens feminine shaver. Wankus said he doesn’t recognize Stevens any more.

Wankus asked Jerry about another product called Orgy in a Bottle. Jerry explained that it was one of the mood enhancers which the company carries. “It makes you horny, alters your mood and calms you down,” Jerry explained. With the mention of Jerry’s keys, Wankus then related the story of how Jerry got hammered. “He actually disappeared. We called a cab for him and everything. Nobody could find him.” Wankus said he was there when Jerry disappeared. “Rainy came running in, dude, I’m scared to death. I don’t know what the fuck happened to this guy.”

Jerry said he went to go find a place to eat. “I was starved.” Faith said she loved the fact that Jerry just started walking. And Jerry then went on to relate that he got stopped by the cops in Burbank. “There was a stabbing and I was walking along in this black jacket, black shirt. Next thing I know, hey you!” Someone in the chatroom commented that Jerry looked like a brown-haired Rip Taylor.

Jerry went on to explain that the gift basket they were giving away had a $200 retail value. “It’s full of goodies off of the [Stardust] website.” Asked if he tried the Deep Throat oral de-sensitizer himself, Jerry said as a sales manager he has to test all the products. The basket, said Jerry also included some DVDS from the Stardust Hall of Famer line including Brazilian Bombshells.

“I have to tell you a funny story about this fuckin’ DVD,” said Wankus. “Somebody came in my office the other day and they said you have any free porn? I’m like take this one here. They’re like, this is fucked up. The fuckin’ chick on the cover looks pretty cute but then he looked down and saw this fuckin’ dick.” Faith wondered why all trannies were from Brazil.

Jerry explained that it was a Bobby Hollander video. “My office is Bobby Hollander’s old office.” Asked if he had ever been naked on camera, Jerry said negative, Wankus indicating that Rainy was working on it. “She’s going to try to get you to do something silly.” Wankus suggested that since Brian didn’t show, maybe Jerry could stand in for him.

“Have any Jack Daniels?” Jerry asked him. “I’m like a chick. You get me drunk, okay.” Asked if he was getting drunk, Jerry said he was trying. “That was scary last time,” said Wankus. “I felt like we had to call our insurance company AND lawyers. You got hammered, man. Really hammered.”

Jerry said he didn’t remember anything that happened. Wankus advised not getting drunk like that around Lorrainiac. “She will put shit in you. She will fuck you up. I’ve got pictures to prove it with a lot of people around here.”

“She’s awesome,” said Faith. Jerry agreed. Wankus said he always gets the question whether Lorrainiac and Cuz Fucker are really cousins and really fuck. “Yeah,” said Wankus. “Her first husband is in jail for murder. And her first husband was also her first cousin and they had a kid together who now lives with her new man who is her cousin and calls him dad. It’s a wacky situation.”

Jerry commented that this was a scenario right out of Deliverance. “That’s why the show is so good,” Wankus replied. “Because it’s real. No bullshit about that show.” Wankus also noted that Rainy was in Cops. “She was Cops as one of the girls in the background. I think it was the first episode of Cops, ever. She was one of the loud, screaming trailer girls. It’s like a train wreck. You have to see this shit.”