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Tyra Banks is a Cunt –Nikki Vail

(SAN FERNANDO VALLEY, CA) — Wednesday night on KSEXradio’s Wanker Show was full of surprises–a common statement made after listening to Wankus and his cast of fun and sexy Co-Hos, but this particular show gave fans a lot of shocking moments.
Cytherea filled in for Michele Raven and the night began with Wankus reading a letter from Filthy Frank of Lord Perious Productions who is serving time in Federal Prison. In the letter, Frank asked for dirty pictures and claimed that although naked photos are not allowed, simply drawing a bathing suit on the girls with a dry erase marker can get the pics past security. Frank also told of prison activities which included Bocce, Basketball, Volleyball and live music nightly. Wankus pointed out that the reason crime has so many repeat offenders is because prison is becoming a country club.

Standing at six feet four with her heels, former runway model turned porn star, Nikki Vail was the guest on the show. Shocked by Wankus’ deep research into her personal life, Vail found herself on the defensive, answering to many rumors Wankus threw at her.

Wankus: I understand you used to date Axle Rose?

Nikki: I don’t know who told you that, but [pause] yes. It’s part of the thing, when I modeled, the two careers come together, you meet a lot of rock stars.

Wankus: Who else? Which other celebrities have you fucked?

Nikki: Michael Hutchins…he’s dead now.

Wankus: Was he good? You can be honest, he’s dead.

Nikki: He sucked. He was a horrible lover.

Wankus: Without naming names, what was it like sleeping with Andre Agassi?

Nikki: Oh my god….how are you getting this information? They have stamina, but they can’t have sex and then go on the court.

Wankus: Right, most athletes can’t get it on and then perform, it drains them.

Nikki: Bjorn Borg was a hot one. I have to mention him. He’s a little old, but oh my god, he was good. I was with a lot of tennis players.

Wankus: Did tennis players ever compare notes? Here’s a good one, did you ever bang any tennis players on the same day, who had to play each other the next day?

Nikki: No.

Wankus: What was it like being with Axel Rose?

Nikki: It was very good.

Wankus: Any dirt?

Nikki: He had a lot of girlfriends, Stephanie Seymore, she’s a hotty. No catfights though.

Wankus: Are you dating anyone now of celebrity status?

Nikki: No

Wankus: [Has info and trying to get her to say it first] Do you have a suitor in the last week?

Nikki: I’m not going to tell you, if I tell you I may never see this guy again.

Wankus: Oh please….is it someone that is offended by adult press?

Nikki: He may not want me to say.

Wankus: Just out of curiosity did you blow him on the 118?

Nikki: No [laughs]

Wankus: Did you get it on with him on a yacht saying things like “You Rock, You Rock?” Do you know who I’m talking about Cytherea?

Cytherea: No

Wankus: [shouts] Tommy Lee!

Nikki: Oh my god!

[Tommy met Nikki last week at the Jill Kelly Productions party and has been allegedly calling on her.]

Wankus: Why aren’t you proud that Tommy’s calling you?

Nikki: I didn’t say I wasn’t proud of it, I just don’t kiss and tell.

Wankus: Tommy wouldn’t care.

Listeners in the KSEXradio Free Interactive Chat Room couldn’t keep up with all the interesting angles to the conversation, as well as Vail’s long list of celebrities she either slept with, lived with, associated with, etc.

Wankus: Lets talk about the transition of runway modeling into porn.

Nikki: I was doing a lot of erotic work as a mainstream model, it’s very close to adult work. You’re naked a lot. I’m always nude. But now, I decided, I love sex, so why not have people watch me have sex!? In Europe people are so loose about things, they don’t take things so seriously. In America we’re so repressed, so fuck America.

[moans from the back of the room]

Nikki: No wait, I didn’t mean to say that.

Wankus: Isn’t it funny that the Persian guy [Boococky-KSEX tech crew] in the back of the room was the most offended by that comment?

Nikki: I didn’t mean that, I just meant there’s a lot of fucked up things going on.

Wankus: We know what you meant. So in porn you’re willing to do just about anything on film?

Nikki: Oh yes, I love it all, fuckin’, suckin’, anal.

Wankus: Will you let Tommy Lee do you anally?

Nikki: Oh hell yeah.

Wankus: When you modeled, you roomed with Tyra Banks, right?

Nikki: Who gave you all these stories?

Wankus: Is she a bitch or what?

Nikki: I’m not going to talk bad about anyone.

Wankus: C’mon, is she a fuckin’ bitch or what?

Nikki: She’s a FUCKIN CUNT!!!

Wankus: [Screamed] YEAHHHHHhhh

Nikki: When I met her in California, people asked if she had fake tits because they saw a scar around her nipple and she said [uses funny voice] “No, that’s where a Doberman bit me.” Ok, shut the fuck up. So I go to London to work, who do they set me up with to live? Tyra Fuckin’ Banks! Oh my god.

Wankus: Did you just want to punch her in the face?

Nikki: I didn’t want to punch her in the face, I wanted to fuckin’ kill her. We went to dinner one night, the bill came to a hundred bucks, she’s like “Nikki, lets go.” I’m like, “we can’t just leave.” She said, “lets go” and we headed for the door. They grabbed her by the hand and made her pay. But she looked at me and said “you never pay for anything, I’m not paying for a thing in life.” Guess what, she got her wish, look at her. A fuckin’ hundred dollar dinner….fuck you you cunt!

Wankus: Any bad living habits [Tyra] has that we should know?

Nikki: She’s not hygienic. She left a tampon on the floor. And blood on the floor.

Wankus: Lovely. Does she wash her hands after going to the bathroom?

Nikki: I don’t know…I never got that close.

Wankus: She bring guys and girls home to get it on?

Nikki: Guys.

Wankus: She wasn’t into girls?

Nikki: No, she wants the money. Girls didn’t have any money.

Wankus: Hey, when you found the bloody tampon, did she try to tell you she used it to clean the blood off her nipple after the Doberman bit her?

Nikki: She didn’t even pick it up off the floor. When I told her to go pick up her bloody tampon, she told me, “Call the maid!”

Wankus: You haven’t fucked any politicians have you?

Nikki: Ughhh….No…..ugh…No

Wankus: Ah, so who did you almost fuck? You started to saying someone but stopped.

Nikki: No one…I don’t want to say anything about any [whisper] presidents.

Wankus: You almost fucked Bush?

Nikki: No, I live in Cape Cod, Mass. Clinton. I don’t want to talk about it.

Wankus: So you met him at a dinner thing.

Nikki: A brunch thing.

Wankus: Any secret service guys approach you later and tell you to meet him.

Nikki: No, Hillary was there.

Wankus: So if she wasn’t there, you might have done him huh?

Nikki: No it would not happen with Bill Clinton, I hate the Kennedy’s, I won’t fuck the Kennedy’s.

Wankus: You know he’s [Bill] part of the Clinton family right?

Nikki: Yeah, I know, I hate Democrats. I’m a Republican. I will never fuck any of those fuckin’ Democrats.

Wankus: I was told you were kidnapped by the mob. Tell me the story.

[Nikki then takes a story and runs in circles about an experience in Milan where she was taken by helicopters and given money to gamble but not required to sleep with mobsters, although she did have sex with one of them. She asked the mobster for an Alpha Romero, but only so she could smash it into a wall. He didn’t get her one and eventually they let her leave. The transcription of the actual story would require a professional decoder, it was all over the place.]

Nikki: They [the mob] were scared of me.

Wankus: I’m a little scared of you too to be honest with you.

Nikki: Shut the fuck up.

Wankus: Did you know what crime family this was.

Nikki: No, but I used to hang out with the Gambino Family. They used to take me to dinner a lot.

Wankus: We’re you sitting AT or UNDER the table?

Nikki: I never fucked any of them, they are all old.

Wankus: Is there a favorite girl or guy you’ve worked with in the industry?

Nikki: Randy West was good.

Wankus: There’s some old cock for you

Nikki: That’s mean!

Wankus: I’m not being mean, I’m just saying he’s an older guy…it’s okay to call the Gambinos old but not Randy West?

Nikki: No, I don’t know, he’s not that old, he looks good.

Wankus: Oh yeah, he’s great and he looks great. [Under Breath] Gotta love those Beverly Hills doctors.

Nikki: [laughs]

Wankus: Who else?

Nikki: I’ve only been doing this a week

Wankus: Oh damn, your brand new.

Nikki: Yup…and I’m leaving next week.

Wankus: So is Tommy Lee going to visit you when you go back east?

Nikki: [Alcohol or other substance really kicking in] I hope so…hey, I mean, I don’t know what Tommy Jones…I mean, Lee is going to do.

Wankus: You’re dating Tom Jones too?

[Room Laughs]

Nikki: No no no…stop it.

The conversation went into the joys of doing anal and the night closed with Wankus singing his traditional goodbye song to Vail. The cast and crew danced out of the studio to close out the show and fans at home didn’t know how to begin to take it all in.

Wild, simply wild.

If you’d like to hire Nikki, contact her with [email protected].




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