Sean’s Random Thoughts for the Week of July 29, 2013: Sydney Leathers, Charlie Sheen, James Deen and Hugo Schwyzer

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Sean writes – We don’t make the news, we just exploit it.

* The only people who didn’t see this coming are named Helen Keller, Jose Feliciano, Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder: This week it was reported that Papa Smurf and Vivid have offered a contract to Anthony Weiner’s sexting partner, the beefy Sydney Leathers [pictured].

This woolly mammoth looking beast is still contemplating the offer although she does have somewhat of a porn background. TMZ reported that Tubby targeted men on the Internet for more than 3 years — actively recruiting (and juggling) multiple sugar daddies who paid up to $4,000 a pop to connect with her. Therefore it would appear putting her abilities on film would not be much of a stretch for Shamu.

All kidding aside about her girth, Smurf may be on to something with Leathers. If [when] she does release a sex tape it’s my belief that it may not be as big of a revenue generator as Farrah Abraham’s production but Leathers will provide a better performance. Just a hunch.

* In an interview with James Deen busted on the great Sasha Grey:

“Sasha Grey has not engaged with anyone in pornography for a really long time. That’s, like, the name that is not said in this business. I don’t have anything against her, but in the adult-film world she has a very bad reputation for many reasons.”

Aside from coming off as a self-centered over hyped too-smart-for-the-room douche bag I have nothing but respect for her.

* Hugo Schwyzer, the social sciences academic at Pasadena City College best known as the “porn professor,” tried to commit suicide Thursday night, he told the Weekly Friday.

“I took an entire bottle of Kolonapin,” he said. That’s a muscle relaxant and anti-anxiety drug.

Schwyzer said he’s physically okay, but reiterated how the social media fallout from a sexting relationship with a sometime porn star and multiple affairs with women made his marriage “over” and sunk him into a deep depression.

Better luck next time, Skippy.

* RadarOnLine reported that according to an insider, Charlie moved 25-year-old Capri Anderson (real name Christina Walsh) into his home nearly one month ago and she is officially one of two new goddesses.

“Charlie doesn’t really hold grudges and lives in the moment, which explains why he’s moved Capri in with him,” the source told Radar.

Does this mean there will be a run on tiger blood again?

* Speculation about James Deen’s sexual orientation has been a hot topic the last day or so. I want to go on record as saying I believe Deen’s a straight shooter. He’s a man’s man. He could be a member of the old guard such as the likes of Marc Wallice, Peter North, Christian XXX, Rocco Reed, and John Holmes. You know, real men.

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